Follow the dice and you will be following some dice - nice.
Funbles thanks their trusted ally Stan Doubt for divulging this exemplary snippet of their indefatigable strategy.
Populism needs a different name. Simplism. What is easily misunderstood is popular. Too many politicians think the way to beat populists is to mimic them. But you can't mimic dishonesty. 'cut migration' 'we want out country back' etc aren't popular ideas. They are simple ideas. There is a difference
The Conservatives are, after all, well placed to know a lot about this morass, since they introduced it. In 2012, the coalition government launched the Plan 2 system of student loans and raised university fees across Britain to £9,000 per annum. To put Plan 2 in simple terms, loan repayments were laid out via a seemingly innocuous series of calculations. The first to consider is the threshold at which repayments begin. If you left education with, say, £27,000 worth of debt, you would only start paying it back once you met a predetermined salary. On its face, this might not seem like a particularly onerous demand. “Low-earning” graduates would avoid being saddled with repayments before they were financially able to begin making them, while their “high earning” peers could start chipping away at their debt, and provide an income stream for the state.
As any of my fellow literature or history graduates will tell you, however, the devil is in the details. For one thing, the threshold at which someone becomes a high earner was never particularly high and, following years of inflation, is now preposterously low. Rachel Reeves’ announcement that the government are freezing the threshold at April 2026 levels (£29,385) for a further three years only makes this worse. The real living wage for London is currently calculated at £28,860, which means that any London-based graduate making just £40 more per month than the minimum needed to live there will automatically begin paying their debt. In real terms, this means practically any graduate in any form of full-time work will be paying as much as 9 per cent of their income to the state, and for a very, very long time. Worse still, the amount owed by those graduates below the threshold does not remain static – it accrues interest, year on year, whether you’re working for low wages, volunteering, taking a career break or on maternity leave, ensuring that if you do pass the threshold some time later, you will be returning to find your original £27,000 much enlarged.
If the state’s attitude to what constitutes “high earnings” makes you think it’s oblivious to the concept of inflation, let me put your mind at ease. When it comes to the calculation of student loan interest, they are very conscious of inflation indeed. Each year, the interest charged on student loans is calculated by two components. The first is the Retail Price Index (RPI), which generally records a higher number than the Consumer Price Index (CPI). Governments prefer the latter, lower figure for many of their other calculations, just not when it comes to adding extra debt to every graduate in the country. To this is added a second component, a percentage tied to each graduate’s earnings, meaning that as your salary increases so too does the interest you’re paying on the loan you took out. If you think this seems like a predatory and punitive way to bilk students for as much money, and over as long a period of time, as possible, then you’re just about up to speed on this scandal, which amounts to a regressive stealth tax on every graduate in the UK. One which, it’s calculated, you would need to be earning £66,000 per year to pay off in anything like a timely fashion.
The debt burden of UK students is one of those things where, the more you look into the details, the more insane and predatory it is. So I tried my best to explain the numbers involved without making my, or your, head explode.
Grey cloudy sky. The tip of a tree at very bottom left of the frame.
Every day, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
Today is no exception.
The sky is not blue.
Dark clouded sky over a moor.
Funbles understands the profound importance of using the BlueSky platform as intended: to report each day on whether or not the sky is blue.
Today, the sky is not blue.
Image description: Line drawing of a map, in the style of something found in 1970s academic journals. A collection of rocks, each numbered from a1 - a15, are arranged in a rough circle, with a four coming off in a line from the top. The rocks are located within a roundish earthwork mound. There's a small box, labelled b, a little to the right of the circle. The map is outlined with a dotted line, with 3.7 along the right and 24.76 along a top section. A striped indicator of scale from 0 - 10 is at the bottom. The image is labelled in handwriting, "SITE OF PRESENT DAY STRUCTURE". Text: "Excerpt from contemporaneous records for dig behind a current day drama school in Hull. Diagram shows a hengiform structure with related hoard. Nature of hoard and hengiform classification of stone circle both questioned. Hoard was shallow burial (approx 3’6”) of wooden box (dimensions unclear), containing traces of natural rubber and remains of plied cotton cording. Likely a ceremonial object. Carbon dating of wood in box structure places piece at approx 1500 BCE." is underneath the map, in a typewritten font
An Indefinitive History of Funbles' ~ ????
Funbles' seasoned Viking associate, Stan Doubt, a frequenter of archeological time teams, pointed us in the direction of this intriguing discovery, suggestive of Funbles' presence there at somepoint:
A brief diversion from Funbles' regular Bluesky musings to bring you this trendy GenZ lifestyle advice that is bemusing them... What do you think? Would you pet a sourdough starter? Or do you prefer to pet a regular pet pet?
Cloudy sky over hazy trees in the distance, with a clearer sight of a closer branch poking in at the top left.
A completely grey sky.
Spots of cloud in the otherwise blue sky, with twentieth century Glasgow tenement buildings visible.
A bright blue sky with some clouds dotted.
BLUE SKY ROUND UP.
Every day, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
The last four days are no exception(s).
The sky was not blue, not blue, blue, and blue!
What colour would you say this is?
Not a new thought but:
The amount of unpaid work a freelance writer expected to do to get a TV show commissioned (or even glanced at) is just unsustainable if you don’t come from a wealthy background or have pre-existing financial security.
We’re missing out on brilliant stories & brilliant people
Photograph looking upward to show blanket cloud in the sky.
Every day without exception, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
Today the sky is not blue.
Help improve Funbles' fulfilment of providing laughter and jollity to you good folks by filling in our feedback form - forms.gle/H5FhbYCfWXja.... Any and all responses are greatly appreciated!
Grey, clouded sky with the tops of Victorian stone buildings to the bottom of the frame.
Every day, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
Today is no exception.
Today the sky is not blue.
1. Click the link 👇
2. Watch the film 🎬
3. Share with your pals 👯
4. Go to step 1 🔁
🎈 🎈 🎈 🎈 🎈
www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/epis...
A photograph of the sky above, completely grey with cloud. The edge of a roof visible to the right of the frame.
Every day, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
Today is no exception.
Today the sky is not blue.
A portrait-oriented photograph of the sky, blue but with around 60% covered in white cloud.
Every day, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
Today is no exception.
Today the sky is partly blue.
Photograph of fully clouded-over grey sky, with the tops of several trees without any leaves.
Every day, Funbles logs into Bluesky and asks whether or not the sky is blue.
Today is no exception.
Today the sky is not blue.
A poster with a collage-y feel. Text reads: Mr Funbles' Sunday Portal: A Vaguely Festive Miracle(ish). Variety show. Alternative comedy. Saturday 6th December. Alphabetti Theatre, NE1 4HF. 7.30pm. Doors & Pre-show experience from 7.15pm. Pay What You Feel. A QR code, above "scan for tickies" An odd sort of sleigh made up of an orange rollerskate with a Celtic swirl over it is being pulled by some pink stick-friends with flamingo heads. There are many oddly green sleighbells attached around them. They're flying over the Mr Funbles' balloon, which is obscured by snow, text and the same green jingle bells wound round its middle. A Yule Log is popping up at the bottom of the poster. The portal is behind this, and the background is a dark blue night sky with sparkling stars, some of which look like balloons.
Open your advert calendar and start your December with Mr Funbles’ Sunday Portal! It’s 19 days until Christmas, 15 days until Solstice, and Saturday 6th December is the day to bring joyful skepticism to your festive malaise.
www.ticketsource.co.uk/alphabetti-t...
I was in the Pleasance Courtyard one time and Marek Larwood, presumably as part of his show, stepped out from his venue and yelled "I'M A BIG BOY NOW!" then went back in - didn't even see the show but the phrase and intonation lives in my head rent free
@junodawson.bsky.social showrunning Doctor Who when, please? An absolutely (inter)stellar episode ✨
Is this an advertisement for Mr Funbles' Sunday Portal? Saturday 26th April 2025 🎈 @alphabettitheatre.bsky.social warm up from 7pm(ish)
No balloons
#mrfunbles #varietyshow #teaser #varietycomedy #newcastlecomedy #clownballoon #queer #queercomedy #tashhag #hashtag #tyneandwearmetro #newmetro
This is so true and articulates something that we've all seen but I could never word properly
A line drawing portrait of Sam Norquist with large text “TRANS PEOPLE DESERVE DIGNITY” above and below. The drawing is of a bigger black trans guy who is shirtless and wears a cap. He is topless and showing off his scars. He wears a baseball cap and behind him is a ribbon that says “Sam nordquist, 2000-2025” and he is surrounded by roses.
I drew this last night after seeing so many pre-surgery/testosterone photos of Sam circulating.
Whether it’s shock value or to further reduce his dignity, I don’t know. Im devastated that this work had to come after so much pain, but I’m glad I could create something that honoured him as he was.
If you want to experience an experience, the Sunday Portal by @mrfunbles.bsky.social will be, positively, an experience 🎈 proballoonly
Mr Funbles asked me to share the above mentioned link below below:
linktr.ee/mrfunbles
Spoonfed this post 🥄🎈
Paddington at the 2025 BAFTA
I Photoshop Paddington into a movie, TV show, or pop culture until I forget: Day 1441
More recently I've been getting back into climbing which does have more of the sheer feral instinct to ascend walls to escape/succeed
*tries to budget time and monies wise to get to another class* *the irony being I prefer rope*
Getting into aerial to be better at jumping through all the hoops needed to succeed in this bureaucratic capitalist hellscape
