‘Did you find a suitable image for the story on what Keir Starmer said about the Iran conflict?’
‘Yes - how about Chris Mason realising he’s just accidentally sent his search history to his mum?’
‘Perfect.’
Yes, give me those plucky people’s champion go-getters facing 115 charges any day of the week
The things you take for granted!
Turned 42 yesterday. Today the optician told me I require varifocals. Tomorrow: care home
Southampton v Sheffield Wednesday should be referred to as ‘the Sanderson derby’.
Imagine having the job title ‘Interim Supreme Leader’.
Exhausting afternoon ahead for Bournemouth
A bleak 1-0 defeat on a Monday night as I recall.
Wolves’ woes this season have been entertaining but I’m glad Derby’s 11-point record has survived because it happened in the past and I don’t want new things to replace old things.
Aston Villa beaten
Goodwin to the voters of Gorton and Denton this morning
Looks like they’ll have to cancel The Last Leg this week
Peter Drury’s habit of slowly, pho-net-ic-ally shouting the name of every player having a shot on goal
@rickburin.bsky.social Very much enjoying this ‘Andrew’ persona you’ve deployed on The Traitors Ireland
In the gym changing room the other night a bloke was talking loudly and at length to his mate about his recent colonoscopy procedure.
At one point he said “The doctor was standoffish - I tried to make conversation so I asked him what he did for a living and he said ‘I do this’ and I said ‘Oh yeah’.”
Andrew being arrested on his birthday
Shoppers who don’t shop at Tesco will be left behind, says Tesco’s John Tesco
Hahahaha
We had to take Luna and Björn to the vets for their annual jabs this morning. I was worried they might be a bit high-strung and on edge after, but here’s the scene 30 minutes after arriving back home
My first thought too. Really hope not.
Commentators giving the player of the match award to whoever scored the winning goal
‘My life is nothing I thought it should be and everything I was worried it would become, because for 50 seconds I thought there was monsters on the world’
Yes
