Finally, I have become Video Games

This is the spirit of the old internet cosplaying as the rot of the new, and I love it

my god

youraislopbores.me

A beautiful attempt at Harlan Ellison

Youraislopbores.me

Oh hey I turned up on my own timeline via the dayjob

(I'm playing the very important & nuanced part of "man failing to print document")

A bunch of horse games on sale in the Steam horse festival. Somehow, this feels deliberate.

A good selection of Horses in the Steam Horse Fest, but I do feel there is one game about Horses that seems to have slipped their minds when they were putting together this otherwise excellent lineup of discounted Horses-based video gaming.

Got kinda sick the first times, but then I got used to it. The machine itself was really fun, but the game was like playing Top Gun on the NES.

Ultimate Full Motion Simulator Arcade Cabinet - Sega R360 - Galloping Ghost Pinball Field Trip YouTube video by Arcade Hollywood

Feels like someone should have lost a limb to this thing, at the very least.

My dream was always to install Tie Fighter on it, but it was dismantled & scrapped when the place closed.

These things we love bring us a lot of joy, but also injury and death.

On the flipside, I did work at an arcade for two years without seeing anyone there get maimed. We even had the 360 flight sim that would physically spin your body around along with the plane on the screen.

I mean, I did mess up my shoulder on a Virtua Fighter 3 arcade machine once

for the love of god i’m begging people to say “genAI” instead of “AI” when that’s what you mean

AI is an ancient and glorious and critical tradition and muddying language makes talking about things very hard sometimes

A fabricated statement from Nintendo of America's Twitter account addressing a fictitious scenario in which the Earth's oxygen supply is presumed to be depleting at a rapid pace, leaving humanity with mere days to live. "This is Miyamoto. On behalf of everyone who is employed at Nintendo Co. LTD and its subsidiaries, we deeply mourn the countless human lives which will be lost due to the depletion of the global oxygen supply. To anyone who has ever played one of our games, we are eternally grateful to have created long-lasting fun and memories for you. To ease the suffering of families and children across the world, the Mario Kart World game for the Nintendo Switch 2 system will be available as a free download on Nintendo eShop for the foreseeable future. We hope this small gesture of kindness will ease the pain as humanity prepares for a worst-case scenario." The statement is distastefully plastered with logos for Nintendo and Nintendo Switch 2, as well as with a render of Mario from Mario Kart World.

A fabricated Twitter thread responding to the fabricated Nintendo statement. John Default Profile Picture: "No one read this statement and thought it was distasteful? Why did Miyamoto think this would help anyone?" NintenDeen: "Simple: Nintendo is so depraved that they'd exploit a global crisis to boost the player count of the failed Mario Kart World and force consumers back into the Switch 2 ecosystem to boost sales and player numbers."

A fabricated Twitter thread responding to the fabricated Nintendo statement. PlayStation Nation: "What the fuck are you doing falsely advertising sales during these trying times? I went to the website and Mario Kart World is still selling for $80 USD." Kremling Kevin: "If you actually read the statement, it clearly says the discount is available on Nintendo eShop. Meaning the application on the Switch 2 itself, not the web browser version." PlayStation Nation: "Point still stands."

A fabricated Tweet responding to the fabricated Nintendo statement. Isaboner: "Nothing for Switch 1 owners?"

Had a dream that there was global panic about the world running out of oxygen, Nintendo was the only video game company to make a statement about it, and the internet collectively spent its final hours on Earth debating whether Nintendo was being genuine or not

My two accounts on the Bsky map, located in video games industry and the Norwegian progressive intellectuals clusters

My solution to this problem involves quantum entaglement theory. I exist in two places at once, and am able to bypass both the Everton supporters and the adjacent MTG cluster.

Make sure to read up on his way-too-funny anecdotes from that time, like the support calls they’d get from people whose pets had peed in the cartridge slot

Finally started CS2 the other day & it feels so good to be back in that world. Now I just wanna buy all this & pretend that import taxes aren’t real

Also, the internet was fast enough and there were enough people & things on it. We could download The Matrix & the South Park movie slowly but surely & burn them to CD-Rs while chatting on IRC

Sorry i just think 1999 is the most important year in pop culture history

Yeah, it’s the online part I’m worried about. I just want to keep what I paid for.

Both my computer installs are recent, so it probably won’t be a problem for a good while, but it’s still a really bad situation.

Hell and damn. This should be one of the most solid businesses in music tech, but it turns out there was indeed a way to eff it up.

Hope something is worked out - or that we can get offline installers for our libraries. I'm want to be learning my Maschine properly this year, not stressing over this

In solidarity with today's ICE OUT OF MINNESOTA blackout, MinnMax is donating $1 to the Immigrant Law Center of Minnesota for every share of this Bluesky post for the next hour.

She doesn’t deserve her own movie, she deserves an entire spinoff franchise (this will include a Saturday morning cartoon series starring her cat)

Me looking sharp

Alright, firing the first shot. Just reply with a pic & a comment that could be interpreted either as a compliment or a devastating diss & we're golden.

I think we followed each other because we bought the same Disco jacket back in the day. Would be open to a «who wore it better» kind of deal that, via misunderstandings and inability to let a grudge go, gradually escalates into something harsh, on the level of a dark Mayfair episode

Ah yes. Perfect for popping the AI bubble

The knife looks like it was bundled with the card as protection. But from what?

Change a letter, ruin a Bluesky handle:

Hideogames

(I guess not completely ruined, but a lot more specific)

A sign saying later versions of the console did not require… removing the battery to switch games? Oh wow

The N-Gage, running a horrid snake game

Played a show in Berlin on Saturday & was somehow still in shape for going to the Computerspielmuseum on Sunday powered by 2.5 hours of sleep & an espresso.

They had an N-Gage exhibition themed around failure.

Nice, made me think of A Softer World

Hase und Wolf, I mean

A non-Lego brick retro 90s PC

Good old D&D

Magnavox Odyssey

A Brown Box replica built by Baer himself

Some final snaps from the trip. Lots more to see at the museum, well worth a visit if you’re in Berlin