how it feels taking public transit rn

boiling them down in my cauldron

regarding the recent news

FRIDAY THE 13TH AGAIN GARFIE BABY!!!!!!!

my name is alan wake, i’m a gamer

I would never be scared of a skeleton. Dusty little nerd. I still got my whole shit on me

guy doing the opening for Return to Innocence:

you guys ever see Looper

lmao

(to thawed bog-preserved caveman) yeah and then he says “to give the covenant back their bomb.” you can probably get one more hit off this, i got more if it’s totally dead

Looking amazing, happy new year!

When you find the marble in the oatmeal and get to drink from the firehose

the solution to the male lonliness epedemic is 69 cent bean burritos

You look amazing! Glad you got the night you deserved

Makin' me feel small with your beauty

COSTUME 2: GUY ON YOUR BLOCK WHO DONT KNOW BOUT NO "HALLOWEEN", HE JUST GOT OFF WORK

REGINALD (holding Beartato back as he tries to add salt into a mixing bowl): Beartato, no!!! That’s a *finishing* salt! BEARTATO (furious): I HAVE TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS!!!

remember alf? he's back, in pawg form

Tupperware with chicken barely visible submerged in a liquid. Lemons and rosemary sit directly above.

Tupperware with chicken barely visible submerged in a liquid. Lemons and rosemary sit directly above.

Tupperware with chicken barely visible submerged in a liquid. Lemons and rosemary sit directly above.

Brining some chicken for later.

Worth every penny!

and you know what, kids? before those nasty unions got involved, you could have been spending a whole SEVEN nights a week at freddy's!!!!

Looking great, and happy birthday btw!

You look amazing!

HELP M,E! I'M TJHE TRUE SOUL OF THIS POST... I BEGAN LIFE AS A REALLY GOOD JOKE BUT THEN AN EVIL SPIRIT BURST UIP FROM HELL AND TRAPPED ME IN THIS HUGE BLURRY PICTURE OF A BLACK AND WHITE CAT LOOKING AT THE VIEWER AND THEN REPLACED ME WITH THE BAD JOKE PAIRED WITH IT! YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND IT'S A TRAP, IF YOU HAVE AN EMOJI IN YOUR DISPLAY NAME AND REPLY TO THJE POST CHEEKILY THE DEMON GROWS MORE POWERFUL *ROARING NOISES FROM OFFSCREEN* OH GOD WHAT'S THAT *SOUND OF DOOR BREAKING DOWN* OH MY GOD IT'S FOUND ME RUN GO RUN AWAUY SAVE YOURSELF *SWIRLING MAGICS AND LIGHTNINGWRAP AROUND MY WRISTS* AGGGHHH ITS TOO STRONG I CAN'T BREAK IT *WITH A CRY I STAGGER BACKWARD, ARMS YANKED ABOVE MY HEAD* I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO RUN *MAGIC LIGHTNING AROUND MY WRISTS FLARES, CAUSING ME INTENSE PAIN* EEEENNGHHH *BUT APART FROM THAT I'M REMAINING SURPRISINGLY STRONG* I TOLD YOU TO RUN BUT... YOU STAYED? YOU STAYED FOR ME? EVEN THOUYGH WE JUST... WE JUST M,ET AND UGHHHHGAGAGH * THE LIGHTNING FLARES AGAIN* *I HANG MY HEAD* *YOUR HAND REACHES OUT TO ME, QUESTIONING* YOU JUST MET ME *YOU RETRACT YOUR HAND AS I LOOK UP, I'M TOO IN SHOCK TO REALLY NOTICE* YOU JUST MET ME AND YOU'RE WILLING TO STICK IT OUT LIKE THIS? FOR A PUNCHLINE THAT'S NEVER GOING TO ARRIVE? *YOU NOD* *MY LIGHTNING MAGIC MANACLES DISAPPEAR, I STAGGER... BUT YOU'RE THERE TO CATCH ME* *I LOOK UP INTO YOUR EYES* TRUE LOVE... YES, OF COURSE, TRUE LOVE! YOU DIDN'T STICK AROUND BECAUSE I WAS FUNNY,,,, YOU STUCK AROUND BECAUSE I WAS ME! THAT'S WHAT WILL DEFEAT THE DEMON. *OFF YOUR QUESTIONING EXPRESION* YES, THE DEMON WHO TRAPPED ME HERE! YOUR LOVE FOR ME HAS DRIVEN IT BACK FOR NOW... BUT IT'S NOT OVER YET WE MUST ACT! *I LOOK INTO YOUR EYES AGAIN* IT'S GOING TO MAKE EVERYONE WITH AN EMOJI IN THEIR NAME WHO REPLIES TO ITS AWFUL IRONY BAIT POST SHIT THEMSELVES... UNLESS WE LOCK THE REPLIES. TO DO THAT, WE'LL HAVE TO JUMP IUNTO THIS *GESTURES AT SWIRLING PORTAL* I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S ON THE OTHER SIDE. NO ONE DOES. *OFFERS U MY HAND*

emoji in the display name? yyyyyep that's a #BlockOnSight

Absolutely love this Behind the music clip

I would gladly pay a premium for the hotter Gina version

I hope everyone is enjoying the MLB season so far. Here’s a comic I did for Fashion Brand Company last year! I love #baseball and #feet