Legit question for rural Bronxites — How do I kill the 30-50 feral seagulls that fly into my personal bubble within 3-5 seconds while I eat my sausage, egg and cheese?

Naturally, the frozen weens were nuked and the slices of bread were lathered in mayonnaise.

To remind myself that I am, in fact, a living, breathing human, I added two sliced hot dogs to my grilled cheese.