saxton

does anyone have the contact info for the shrimps? asking for a friend.

"I don't have two wolves in my head I have these lil guys" the Muppet goblins from the labyrinth

11/10

okay good news, one of my new hires online creeped the entire management team at work before she started (respect) and she said she couldn't find me anywhere no matter how hard she tried. so I think I'm safe.

I guess I should find out!

hey that's my move!

no way, we love a surprise villain

deal!

invite me as the surprise (no one knows my intentions, not even me)

I want to be her

well, which would you rather?

hooray thanks!!

I SECOND THIS

I love all kinds! maybe something spooky?

I have not!! thank youuuu

send them again! but also find us more weird documentaries!

please send book recommendations for my trip at the end of the month!

*video of a guy falling and spilling his drink*

my sister in law: I feel like he could have handled that better, honestly.

looks like a Miss, maybe he married into the sausage kingdom?

see also: beret

miss sausage queen 1955

found a picture of your mum at work (she was a babe)

they're calling them the Terrible 20's

eeewwewww nooooo

Wilma Flintstone using a mammoth as a vacuum

every vacuum since the original has been an absolute joke. why did we try to improve on perfection.

me, a youth, listening to cell block tango: gum popping seems like a wild reason to kill a man!
me, an adult: I would kill a man for breathing too loudly

he was strongly in favour

guys, the foil ones don't make any sounds when you stab them with a steak knife! 🥳

i have lost the plot on what it means when the groundhog does or doesn't do the thing, but i can agree it's probably not a great way of forecasting weather

the local business association just invited me to their "international women's day networking event". i don't have a linkedin, or a business card, or any desire for anyone to know who i am professionally, so how did my identity break containment? which one of you is pranking me? 🤮😭

they are those metallic foil ones, I don't know if I trust this hahah