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Ted Cruz

@tedcrvz

asPiring humAn pResident Of earth. Dear reader, You can learn all about it at tedcruzforhumanpresident.com

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Latest posts by Ted Cruz @tedcrvz

Motherfucker doesn't even have half of a plan and his own Intel says he's going to fail.

07.03.2026 17:50 πŸ‘ 11 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Surprisingly yes!

07.03.2026 16:30 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Hillary stated under oath that UFOs and aliens are bogus conspiracy theories. She has put her integrity on the line to continue to cover and obscure information regarding our infiltration of the earth human race, and for that I am loyal to hil-dawg.

07.03.2026 07:33 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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Uh, because either you voted for a felon or didn't show up to vote at all?

07.03.2026 05:08 πŸ‘ 763 πŸ” 137 πŸ’¬ 42 πŸ“Œ 8

Kamala would have stopped me from shitting my pants

07.03.2026 07:22 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Ted Cruz is the kid on Friday afternoon that reminds the teacher that he forgot to assign homework over the weekend

06.03.2026 22:49 πŸ‘ 9 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

imagine not being fucking annoyed by ted cruz

06.03.2026 22:40 πŸ‘ 9 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
a cartoon character from the simpsons is standing in front of a row of lockers ALT: a cartoon character from the simpsons is standing in front of a row of lockers
07.03.2026 05:42 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

bsky.app/profile/tedc...

07.03.2026 05:40 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It's the only thing I can put my finger on since I let Trump say those things about my wife 😒

07.03.2026 05:38 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Nah dude, I'm fuckin loaded rn frfr. All that oil and war contractor money πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘ the only absolute crisis is my lack of first class round trip tickets to Tahini

07.03.2026 05:36 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

What do you mean "back?" It wasn't a phase, mom.

07.03.2026 02:26 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Karoline Leavitt: It doesn't matter if Russia is helping Iran kill American troops.

What a breathtakingly twisted White House.

06.03.2026 22:25 πŸ‘ 3875 πŸ” 1483 πŸ’¬ 384 πŸ“Œ 118
graphic with the quote, "When a few drones get through or tragic things happen, it's front-page news. I get it, the press only wants to make the president look bad."

graphic with the quote, "When a few drones get through or tragic things happen, it's front-page news. I get it, the press only wants to make the president look bad."

Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth's response to US troops dying

06.03.2026 22:08 πŸ‘ 2799 πŸ” 721 πŸ’¬ 334 πŸ“Œ 155

Haha bahamas it is

07.03.2026 02:11 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

If y'all want rain, I can head to the bahamas or Cancun.

07.03.2026 01:51 πŸ‘ 8 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Ahh yes, a standard Earth human greeting

06.03.2026 22:58 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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Coffee, straight out of my nose.

06.03.2026 19:28 πŸ‘ 10840 πŸ” 2001 πŸ’¬ 295 πŸ“Œ 185
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06.03.2026 20:16 πŸ‘ 6735 πŸ” 1651 πŸ’¬ 285 πŸ“Œ 106

It's been one thing after another. All these small things would make anyone tired. I for one am gassed, naturally. The only people who are enjoying this are the masochists who are pro-pain.

06.03.2026 18:49 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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there is no low or lie his magats will not accept

#itsacult #magacult #trumpcult

05.03.2026 23:03 πŸ‘ 49 πŸ” 19 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
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hey look a fun history lesson!

06.03.2026 04:53 πŸ‘ 14477 πŸ” 4929 πŸ’¬ 119 πŸ“Œ 66
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We don't care about your stock portfoios, Scam Bondi.

We want justice for the victims.

We want an "administration" that doesn't humiliate us on a daily basis.

We want the 25th Amendment and a tribunal trial for the whole rotten lot of you NOW.

06.03.2026 15:17 πŸ‘ 62 πŸ” 16 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 2

She's built like a ballroom, but handles like a disco.

06.03.2026 17:03 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh man we are HAVING A NEWS DAY I see

*BLACKROCK’S $26 BILLION PRIVATE CREDIT FUND LIMITS WITHDRAWALS

06.03.2026 14:30 πŸ‘ 1657 πŸ” 338 πŸ’¬ 35 πŸ“Œ 115
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WAPO: β€œ.. Since the war began Saturday, Russia has passed Iran the locations of U.S. military assets, including warships and aircraft, said the three officials, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because of the matter’s sensitivity.”

@washingtonpost.com
www.washingtonpost.com/national-sec...

06.03.2026 11:14 πŸ‘ 2280 πŸ” 1200 πŸ’¬ 243 πŸ“Œ 186

Wait. They are releasing Epstein files to distract Americans from the war in Iran now?

06.03.2026 02:49 πŸ‘ 10632 πŸ” 2025 πŸ’¬ 409 πŸ“Œ 120
A screenshot of a tweet from 2021 saying "Wow you artists shitting on NFTs are going to feel really silly in a year or two. Times change. Keep up." The tweet has aged poorly.

A screenshot of a tweet from 2021 saying "Wow you artists shitting on NFTs are going to feel really silly in a year or two. Times change. Keep up." The tweet has aged poorly.

05.03.2026 17:25 πŸ‘ 178 πŸ” 31 πŸ’¬ 18 πŸ“Œ 2

We don't eat babies!

06.03.2026 03:09 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0