🩸Aqua Tofana Gentileschi🩸

Why do I even bother at my job if no one is going to listen to me after saying the same shit for years???

The petty part of me wants to get stickers with POTUS on them saying "i DiD tHaT" and put them on gas pumps like they did for ol Joe but I don't want it to look like I support Biden in any way either

This is my new mantra

There is barely even a mark on my car, but I'm still baffled tbh

Remember when Rory got hit by a deer and it was the most wild thing anyone had ever heard? Yeah, that happened to me on my way to work 🙃

How am I supposed to focus when there's socially progressive horny historical romance right in front of me?!

It's honestly criminal that I have a midterm due the weekend that part 2 of Bridgerton 4 comes out

AAAHHHH HAPPY HATCH DAY @shrugsyolo.bsky.social !!! 💜

There are things I should be doing rn but I made myself tired by getting worked up over the fact that I've been screaming the same shit for the last 9 years and noone listens or cares and I just wanna burn everything down 🥰

Wearing my bat'leth earrings to signal to everyone that I'm ready for a Gik'tal with anyone who tries me today 😤

Patron: We're looking to rent a room for evenings around 6:30

My unchecked ADHD brain forgetting I'm at work and need to not just say the first thing on my mind: LOL good luck with that

Some people on campus think I'm in my mid-20s (score) and some think I look exactly my age. I have achieved the level of being able to masochistically say "guess" when people ask how old I am, as Boomers did to me growing up

I've done it, I've finally reached a milestone; my age has apparently reached the status of *ambiguously* adult

I have one, still can't kiss his face 😭

I hate it when my fiancé is sick because I just wanna kiss his face and I can't kiss his face because I don't wanna get sick but I wanna kiss his face because it's so kissable 😭😭😭

A screenshot from Metal Gear Solid1

It's been two years. Rest in peace, my princess. Not a day goes by that I don't miss our conversations, cuddles, and constant bickering. I will never know another soul like you. 🖤

Yesterday: Ah fuck, I'm out of Ritalin!!

My brain all day: fjwj3hifkehqhrkkgifj3bwjkakrjduvnenqldjwjalcuge *general executive dysfunction*

Gods I love my psychiatric meds but I truly hate that I become utterly incompetent if for some reason I don't take them

Clytaemnestra deserved better.

Waiting for the moment I wake up and realize this isn't real, I just fell asleep watching reruns of The Apprentice

Y'know, I'm not a J. Biebs fan (not a hater, just not a fan) and I've always felt like his public persona was a douchebag. That being said, I fell down a rabbit hole about the Yummy music video and now I just have so much sympathy for the guy. I believed him when the Diddy stuff came out, but damn 😮‍💨

Just saw a guy on campus chasing a group of women with a Nerf gun eat shit twice on the same sheet of black ice like an old cartoon

*sung to the tune of "Fly" by Sugar Ray* IIIIIIIIIII JUST WANNA CRY 🥲

how do I know if i'm in the wrong timeline

I love Appalachia because there are so many stereotypes but I just spoke to a man who is obviously cis, white, hetero and a veteran but he talked about his gay sister and his punk wife and he complimented my purple hair. You truly never know what you're gonna get here and it's great!

I watched the Stranger Things finale and now I am emotionally scarred

Someone give Sadie Sink an Emmy already

Why does December always have to be filled with chaos that is completely unrelated to the holidays???

A small black and white comic. The comic shows me in four stages. At the beginning I am lurched over in my office chair, prepared to work hard. A speech bubble says: 'Okay. Time to lock in and-.' My cat's head is peeking up from around my lap. In the second part, my cat has started to crawl into my space. I look down at her, but am still distractedly saying: 'Time to lock-' In the third part my cat is starting to make herself comfortable on my chest, where she likes to be. I am succumbing, looking off in the distance saying: 'To-' By the fourth section, I have fully surrendered. She is sleeping on chest. It's all over.