Wet Luzinski

Let’s not forget the bulletin board material for the D-Backs. Good times.

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How the hell is it that the Sixers ____________

The optics of people on the staircase walking by this scrum as if there were somewhere much more important to get to appeals to my metaphorical sensibility, sir.

(Ghetto/underprivileged ethnicit(ies) coded, traditionally. Just depends on the era.) Because of the influx of Central and South American players in later years, and because sister said so: Catholic.

Sir, have Ron keep a line open for Kermit.

Leo has a touch of Elliott Ness in him, doesn’t he, sir.

If only 2 out of 5 pitches he’ll see are strikes, that leaves no margin at all to chase for a batter who is *desperate* to hit the ball hard. (That pretty well describes a Harper at bat.)

Instead of a strike, sir, this play makes me wonder if the MLBPA might try a European -style work action like committing to play the first Monday of the month games like this, or agree to leave the bats on their shoulders in the first.

“If you can get interested in curling, try opera!”

Philadelphia 2026 Winter Olympics: We Goin’ Skittchin

The Opening and Closing Ceremonies are a phenomenal way to let the theater kids confound the jocks.

🎶We all live in a narco submarine, a narco submarine, a narco submarine 🎶

Let’s shovel!!!

I didn’t feel like there was any way at the time he could come back, and I feel I’m as generous a fan as any. It was truly a colossal pressure failure on the order of Buckner’s. But an offseason has mellowed me. He’s young, it shouldn’t define him, and the Dodgers ultimately won the Series.

Rizzo:Bicentennial in Philadelphia::Trump:250th in the U.S.

I’m sure the Swiss Guards keep a close eye on the poor boxes and count the silverware every time Vance swings by, sir.

“Here’s a hat and what’s her hurry?”

Bermuda was a nice touch, sir.

Castellanos is fated to be the Mentos in the Padres’ 2L bottle of Diet Coke clubhouse.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, Barbi Benton featured prominently in Aaron Spelling’s Rolodex. Likely had easily guessable doodles on her card.

I’m trying to move past these people to focus on Bondi’s dog, sir, but it’s exhausting.

I always appreciated how carefully he listened to sportswriters’ questions, because he would both answer them or completely make fun of the thoughtless and lazy ones. But as for the Phillies, he had run his course, sir.

“That boy puts a good stroke on those balls, sprays ‘em to all fields.”

“Hard to believe, Harry.”

All the rest are weird nomads or just bolted on mascots or animals, even though some are legit regional.

On 2d thought I kinda like the rote simplicity of the Browns, so will put them in the “weird third tier.”

Middle tier:
Bears
Dolphins
Ravens
Vikings
Buccaneers

Weird 3rd tier:
Broncos
Bills
Pats (old less stylish logo better)
Jets
Giants
Texans (were better when they* were Oilers)

*yes I know the Oilers are really now the Titans

I’m less of a fan of the team now (but still like their helmets- evocative of NW native art).

I tend to prefer *aesthetics/logos* of teams whose unis evoke their regions/histories.

Top tier:
Seahawks
Saints
Cowboys
49ers
Steelers
Eagles
Packers

Seahawks were my adopted AFC team when I was a kid in middle school and they were new ca. 1977. I liked their helmets (and also bc the Eagles were terrible). I even had a Steve Largent #80 jersey.

Let’s turn our attention to baseball, sir, while we’re relatively certain there’ll be a season to enjoy this year.

Last year saw a bit more offense, sir.