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A fabricated statement from Nintendo of America's Twitter account addressing a fictitious scenario in which the Earth's oxygen supply is presumed to be depleting at a rapid pace, leaving humanity with mere days to live. "This is Miyamoto. On behalf of everyone who is employed at Nintendo Co. LTD and its subsidiaries, we deeply mourn the countless human lives which will be lost due to the depletion of the global oxygen supply. To anyone who has ever played one of our games, we are eternally grateful to have created long-lasting fun and memories for you. To ease the suffering of families and children across the world, the Mario Kart World game for the Nintendo Switch 2 system will be available as a free download on Nintendo eShop for the foreseeable future. We hope this small gesture of kindness will ease the pain as humanity prepares for a worst-case scenario." The statement is distastefully plastered with logos for Nintendo and Nintendo Switch 2, as well as with a render of Mario from Mario Kart World.

A fabricated Twitter thread responding to the fabricated Nintendo statement. John Default Profile Picture: "No one read this statement and thought it was distasteful? Why did Miyamoto think this would help anyone?" NintenDeen: "Simple: Nintendo is so depraved that they'd exploit a global crisis to boost the player count of the failed Mario Kart World and force consumers back into the Switch 2 ecosystem to boost sales and player numbers."

A fabricated Twitter thread responding to the fabricated Nintendo statement. PlayStation Nation: "What the fuck are you doing falsely advertising sales during these trying times? I went to the website and Mario Kart World is still selling for $80 USD." Kremling Kevin: "If you actually read the statement, it clearly says the discount is available on Nintendo eShop. Meaning the application on the Switch 2 itself, not the web browser version." PlayStation Nation: "Point still stands."

A fabricated Tweet responding to the fabricated Nintendo statement. Isaboner: "Nothing for Switch 1 owners?"

Had a dream that there was global panic about the world running out of oxygen, Nintendo was the only video game company to make a statement about it, and the internet collectively spent its final hours on Earth debating whether Nintendo was being genuine or not

Tweet from @TheOmegaVirus Mgs4 boss: *Tries to give Snake a lapdance and dies* Drebin: "That was Angry Armadillo, she was forced to eat cement as a child"

With more people getting the opportunity to play Metal Gear Solid 4, it means more people will understand one of my favorite posts online

o oscar de melhor roteiro original vem aí!

A temporada 11 de Doctor Who é um lixo

Eu acompanho um cara no Instagram que manja de demência e ele tem vários vídeos falando que até o meio do ano o Trump bate as botas, e eu não sei se é verdade, mas eu sei que isso me enche de esperança nesse ano que já tá difícil

Just saw another "China Struggles" article and it reminded me of this.

Essa run de Truck Simulator no #AGDQ2026 foi maravilhosa

Começando a semana do AGDQ, uma das melhores do ano

We had a good run

Eu moro em área de enchente e não sei o que é pior no verão, o calor ou a chuva 🫠

nice

Nada me deixa mais triste que abrir a lista dos 100 livros mais comprados da Amazon

Já que é massa pra madeira, provavelmente é pra atrair cara de pau

Things are now in motion that cannot be undone

Minerals! Thanks Santa!

As gráfica tudo sem saber que figurinha eles vão fazer

Cadê o Cornflakes?

"babies are born worshipping unknown gods" is one of the most incredible dwarf fortress bugs i have heard of. its poetry.

Aparentemente, o segredo pra uma boa adaptação do King no cinema é ter o Mark Hamill no elenco

Piper, o Bardo (com uns lvls de mago)

Nunca vi tanta janela na minha vida

The meme shows Brian in a room with the text "imagine hating on me and I'm just in my room also hating on me"

KIM KITSURAGI - "What is it, detective? Can you make it out?"

BULLET - "if you read this you are gay lmao"

1. "It, um, doesn't say anything."

2. "Transgender ideology. My old foe."

3. [Espirit de Corps - Medium 10] "I think you should read it for yourself, Kim."

depois de dois anos da primeira tira, completando agora com o personagem abrindo a latinha de cerveja que deve tá quente já mas fodase, bolsonaro condenado cuida pai sextou

PODE JÁ!!

Rock Looked Way Cooler Wet

Rock Looked Way Cooler Wet