Alan Grice

"Good luck, but you'll never be as good as Dixie."

Watching Tom Hingley in Bickershaw on a Thursday night, as you do.

I could've dropped it off for ya, etc etc

Parade's off

I caused the whole Example versus Wigan "media furore".

I think you mean barm, etc etc

Some massive ties right here.

You just don't understand, man. There was this one time under Uncle Roy that they were in the bottom half of the table for a bit.

Why did I think he was a left back? Who am I thinking of? Did Bayern used to have a Canadian left back, or am I going loopy

This delivery driver throws treats to all the dogs on his route to see if they can catch. Spoiler alert: some of them definitely cannot. Still 13/10 for all (TT: jezzyvi)

I'd take Archie Gray.

How do their fullbacks look?

I think we might take Richarlison on loan if they go down. They'll need people off the wage bill, and let's pay a loan fee to see how it goes. Judge how broken he is.

He narrowly missed out on the Foreman Grill.

Whatever happened to "Mum, Hendos scored"?

I'm hearing some of you didn't back us today again.

This is very strange. I'd pencilled this game in for my next visit, but didn't bother because there were no tickets where I wanted to sit. Now you can choose any part of the ground you like.

a baby is sitting at a table with a bottle of water in front of him . ALT: a baby is sitting at a table with a bottle of water in front of him .

2-0 to the blues.

It was, at least, brief.

They found this lad in Coopers.

Richard Wright, that time he used his club card.

We're all that guy there, right?

Here he is, captain charisma.

Sleep Token were robbed.

No, me neither.

Did you see the game, Sam?

"Something something, cocaine backstage."

Is nobody else allowed to have a go at presenting?

Do the Brits know that other comedians exist? Jack Whitehall again?

Have Dortmund always played that dirge before their matches?