Jono

Are you still a part of the Rhythm Nation?

Yes, I should take this advice!

Also, great name - my favourite book

Save up and buy fewer things, but nicer things instead of cheaper stuff. In particular - bedding, furniture, cookware

A coworker just told me about how she likes to leave leftover pizza in the fridge for a few days and then eat what she describes as "pizza jerky"

Do I call HR?

So Trump says that kids will only have 3 dolls now. Which 3 of these do you choose?

A Wendy's JBC is the perfect snack for a health nut like myself

Same energy: "I don't have a lawn mower, but my lawn keeps growing! Any ideas on how I can get my lawn looking neater and more trimmed? Any help would be appreciated."

#ProudBlue

'Suspected spam' is not as meaty as we thought it would be in the 80s

Roses are red, rivers are wet...
Your mom's got a sweet

That would have been the first thing I grabbed tbh

A coworker walked in with the the same coat as me and I said "hey, we're the jacket brothers!" and a different coworker told me that I shouldn't call ourselves that or ever say it out loud

If I understand it it means appreciating and understanding other people?

I don't understand how the word "woke" has a negative connotation

i feel a sense of accomplishment when everyone eats the leftovers

There comes a time in everyone's life when you think, ok I've heard enough new music - I'm ok only hearing songs I already know

Watching Suits - for lawyers it seems crazy that no one can keep a GD secret

Jonitals

What's up with deodorant companies trying to tell you to use it on your genitals?

a human’s death certificate is a ghost’s birth certificate.

(Cool cigarette hanging out of the corner of my mouth only it's a french fry)

Instead of a bio with "proud dad" just once I wanna see "I'm pretty fucken ashamed of these grifting toddlers and here's your wallet back"

If he wasn't a doctor or if his name was Norman instead of Dre so many lyrics wouldn't have worked

Surf's up

"Are you serious? I totally would have licked that out..." - my dog looking at me when I threw out the empty dog food can

Remember when we had to carry around our flip phones AND a digital camera? My god we were like pack mules

Contrary to what you might have heard, running away solves absolutely everything.

I once got lost in the woods and it was terrifying, I didn’t think I’d make it out alive.

Well, it wasn’t quite the woods so much as IKEA.

Kids don't know how good they have it...when you're an adult you don't get new underwear and socks for Christmas anymore 🫤

*hearing Tears in Heaven for the first time*

I bet Weird Al could make this about a sandwich.