Against League 3

Public service announcement:

‘Magic of the cup’ does not and can not apply to Wrexham.

Passed away peacefully in his jeep..

… sleep.

Commentator: ‘We apologise for the break in play here at Loftus Road where Beelzebub has manifested on the centre circle and warned those in attendance that Kerry Katona is the actual anti-Christ but hopefully we can return to our coverage of QPR against Norwich as soon as possible.’

Commentator: ‘And that’s never what you want to see, the centre half has launched a diving kung fu kick towards a fan before launching a satanic ritual in the middle of the pitch wearing a crown of pineapples’

Me: …

elmo from sesame street is standing in front of a wall of fire . ALT: elmo from sesame street is standing in front of a wall of fire .

Commentator: ‘You don’t want to see the referee send off one or two key players’

Me:

Every football commentator that ever said ‘oh we don’t want to see that’ has been wrong.

It was absolutely as bad as you expect. Went full exorcist. Never go full exorcist.

I’m not lying..

30 seconds later and he’s through on goal. Incident clearly hasn’t affected his build up play but it has knocked his finishing. 0-0.

Bucket of sawdust later and play resumes with #24 not leaving the pitch. Non league football. Nothing like it.

Play stopped at Southport V Buxton this evening because Buxton’s #24 has just vomited all over the pitch.

a man in a suit and tie is holding a drink and saying now you have my attention . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is holding a drink and saying now you have my attention .

MRW now the UK have picked someone genuinely interesting, skilled, entertaining and talented to represent us at Eurovision.

I’ve never known this man make a recommendation that didn’t stand up. It’s actually bloody infuriating. I’ve had a blast watching this tonight.

The NFL is just aerial ice hock…

Well it isn’t really but that was the best I could do 😭

a race track with a banner that says tag heuer on it ALT: a race track with a banner that says tag heuer on it

Yes it is

Welcome to Chorley FC, where the half time challenge is to smash a ball into a washing machine.

Alex Honnold freesoloing Taipei 101 was the most stunning and incredible display of athleticism, skill and batshit insanity I’ve ever had the pleasure of watching. Can’t believe what I’ve just watched.

Alex Honnold you absolute madman. This is utterly terrifying.

RIP FBref. Disastrous. Since starting my own database of historic results, I've been very unpleasantly surprised at the amount of commercialisation and gatekeeping over not just stats, but even results.

Hopefully someone starts something opensource 👀

Do knaves count against PSR? 🤔

I choose to believe there is an official butler with two knaves running around trying to undermine him.

I enjoyed looking at Gremio's Wikipedia page today and finding, in the 'Club Officials' section, that the club has an official butler.

Name a more iconic duo than schools and letters home in comic sans.

Entries close at 12:00 local time (GMT). I'll do the draw at some point this evening.

Red alert

Charles Alcock was a key figure in the development of the sport. A big figure in the early FA, formation of the FA Cup.He published a number of books which are quite rare and quite valuable. Staggered to find a genuine one under the tree.

The wife has completed Christmas. Absolutely speechless opening this.

"Daddy did this Freddo cost 39p?"

"No mate, they're not *that* expensive"

"But it says '39p' on it?"

"... Well I'll be..."