Lost in Criterion

I don't get it. Why can't she hear his heartbeat? Why hasn't she cut something in half yet? Did Zatoichi lie to me?

If Pat's household is made to consume one more Zatoichi film I think that I will never be welcome there.

All of them are a little fun (except In Desperation) and some of them are really great, but like with a lot of Criterion boxsets, if we were watching them more leisurely I think we'd be more into them.

The Zatoichi boxset ends on an entirely middling note, but at least Ichi gets to hide in a container too small to contain him.

Finally moving on from the Zatoichi boxset and most of my notes for the next episode are just "wow Charlie Chaplin is so much better at making movies than Shintaro Katsu."

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Just posted our February Patreon Bonus. Supporters voted for Best in Show (Christopher Guest, 2000) from a list in honor of the late Catherine O'Hara, and like last month's bonus, we're mostly just happy to not be talking about Zatoichi. $1 gets you access at www.patreon.com/lostincriter...

Remember, the enemy of the enemy is not your friend. Because a fascist is mad at a company led by a eugenics cult doesn't mean you should align with the latter.

This week we talk about the best Zatoichi movie and one that is in the running for worst thing we've seen in the Criterion Collection in 13 years of the podcast. And also there's Zatoichi at Large.

The films that could benefit from being added to the collection are mostly shorts so let say:

- Short films by Michaël Dudok de Wit
- Short films by Paul Driessen
- A collection of significant shorts like La Maison en Petits Cubes, The Diary of Tortov Roddle, The Village, Asparagus, etc.

On the bright side, all of my nephews who are currently obsessed with it will be old enough to have taken over the podcast already.

Quick math says fall 2039.

KPop Demon Hunters getting a Criterion Collection release before any film from Satoshi Kon, Ralph Bakshi, Mamoru Oshii, Don Bluth or Sylvain Chomet might actually kill me.

This week Zatoichi says goodbye to Daiei Studios, but director Kenji Misumi gives two of his visually best showings: Samaritan Zatoichi (1968) and Zatoichi and the Fire Festival (1970). And also there's Zatoichi Meets Yojimbo (1970) which is fine but should be better.

Incredible that after 22 of these, Zatoichi can still surprise me, like when Zatoichi spends 30 seconds trying to stab a leaf with his cane and when he succeeds it triggers a 19 second long lo-fi hip hop beat that plays while he walks away.

The Bluesky app has apologists for DW Griffith and Leni Riefenstahl but running into an honest-to-john "Acktually, she's not his step-daughter, she's the sister of his children" Woody Allen defender in the wild (and at this of all times) over here kind of took me aback, I am not gonna lie.

Week six of the Zatoichi boxset is our favorite week yet, we get Zatoichi meets an Anarcho-mutualist, Zatoichi and the Porno Plate Plot, and Zatoichi meets Ikiru.

Costa-Gavras' "Missing" is absolutely a must see now. There are scenes of such casual violence. People walking through the city stepping around the corpses of executed civillians. Showing what it's really like to live in the kind of police state that ICE aspires to.

This week we have two films in which Zatoichi gets too sad to kill anymore, and one in which Zatoichi's sword gets too sad to kill anymore.

they should make a movie series about how it’s irresponsible to use technology to mess with the natural order of things for profit

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We have reached the Zatoichi film where there's an anarchist who refuses to kill, teaching the local peasantry about agricultural co-ops and I need 25 movies about this guy please.

This week we are to the point in the Zatoichi set where I describe one as "mercifully short" triggering a conversation on the fatigue we feel when Criterion shows us too much of something, but thankfully it is sandwiched between two actually pretty good movies.

That boxset is going to take forever.

To Shaq Fu Thanks for Everything Julie Newmar

I am resigned that I will never get an Antonioni film on the level he intended it, but finding alternative interpretations has become fun.

Zatoichi fatigue is imminent, but holds off this week thanks to some very fun gags.

Oh, we miss the point on a lot of stuff all the time, that's part of the fun. But yeah, of course they aren't dressed like that because of Miami Vixe, but to be fair we were both 10 months old in the Midwest when this came out, so we weren't dressing like that in the 80s.

After working through the box set, we started using the phrase “Zatoiching” when we multitasked several onerous tasks at one time in a whirlwind of action.

By the time this is over we will have seen all his tricks, all his tactics. We will have seen where everyone else failed, so will know what to avoid. Truffaut watched a dozen gangster movies and thought he could make one. We watch 25 Zatoichi movies and we will be able to defeat him.

It's week two of the Zatoichi the Blind Swordsman boxset, this week covering Zatoichi the Fugitive (1963), Zatoichi on the Road (1963), and Zatoichi and the Chest of Gold (1964), exactly one of which has anything interesting going on.