The Name’s Nutz. Neil Nutz.

Toto says RELEASE THE SANDBAGS!!!!

Arvind Lindblad sounds like Principal Seymour Skinner’s real name. Expect the real Seymour Skinner to turn up at a later Grand Prix before being tied to a chair and sent away on a train for being as dull as a brick.

(Not counting sprints, so don’t come at me with Qatar last year. Sorry, Yuki)

The answer seems to be the 2024 Azerbaijan Grand Prix.

When was the last time the number 2 driver at Red Bull out-qualified his team mate without penalties? #f1

Arvind Lindblad sounds like a Northern European logistics firm that has absolutely no brand recognition other than seeing their lorries every time you’re on the M40.

🎶 der-der-DER-DER!!!
IN THE TYRE WALL!!!! 🎶

Arvind Lindblad sounds like the name Lisa gave to Homer when he asked if she had a boyfriend. Some time this season he’s going to have a nuclear power plant’s safety console delivered to him by Bart.

…to then watch Megson decide that the second leg of the round of 16 was the perfect time to play the reserves because “we’ve got to keep our attention on Wigan on Sunday”.

We took Sporting to extra time despite him, losing to a 115th minute goal.

We then also lost at Wigan on the Sunday.

And the link to the screen shot above refers to him steering us to a glorious UEFA cup campaign where we drew in Munich, beat eventual winners Zenit, become the first English side beat Red Star in Belgrade and the first English team to beat Atletico Madrid over two legs…

He turned down the chance to sign Denilson - DENILSON - for Bolton after watching him train because, and I quote, “you shouldn’t put a tiara on a shire horse”.

He also personally chose Anelka’s replacement when we sold him to Chelsea. Full of anticipation until we saw it was Grzegorz Rasiak.

<Stares In Megsonesque disbelief>

#bwfc

FRAU NUTZ: “does being with me make you feel like the luckiest man on earth?”

ME: *LONG PAUSE, GULP*

Modern English Logic:

It’s not the person travelling the wrong way down a one way street who is the villain, but the one who points it out as they rush to avoid getting run over.

A lad in the 5 a side WhatsApp group has said he has used AI to pick a starting line up, subs, timings, and tactics for tonight's league game and another lad has called him
"Neil Wargrok" 😂

Father Ted crowning the winner of the Craggy Island Lovely Girl competition

One of the UK Darts Open competitors is called Thomas Lovely

This horse wins World Book Day

I’ll come back to this now, even though it was ages back.

I heeded t your words, and thought to myself “you know what? I haven’t bright any fruity beer back for years”

So I got some of this. Not just cherry beer. 8% cherry beer.

The whole headline sounds like something a horse racing commentator would say 6 furlongs from the finish.

(NOTE: I am not calling Tamzin Outhwaite a horse)

#F1 is back this weekend!

The horse bolted so far, so long ago for this half-arsed admittance of guilt that it became dog food and then white dog poo and then evaporated way before the stable door was shut.

Lee Bowyer, 2nd April 2005:

DAVE!

BENSON!

PHILLIPS!!!!!!!!

I’ve managed to survive London for over quarter of a century now, by following a really useful mantra:

Don’t be an obnoxious cunt, and people tend to leave you alone.

Rory’s fucked for.

This war has better not escalate any time soon. I’ve just done my big shop.

Images of an old silver 1999 Toyota Corolla for sale

You want a car that gets the job done? You want a car that's hassle free? You want a car that literally no one will ever compliment you on? Well look no further. The 1999 Toyota Corolla. Let's talk about features. Bluetooth: nope Sunroof: nope Fancy wheels: nope Rear view camera: nope...but it's got a transparent rear window and you have a fucking neck that can turn. Let me tell you a story. One day my Corolla started making a strange sound. I didn't give a shit and ignored it. It went away. The End. You could take the engine out of this car, drop it off the Golden Gate Bridge, fish it out of the water a thousand years later, put it in the trunk of the car, fill the gas tank up with Nutella, turn the key, and this puppy would fucking start right up. This car will outlive you, it will outlive your children. Things this car is old enough to do: Vote: yes

Consent to sex: yes Rent a car: it IS a car This car's got history. It's seen some shit. People have done straight things in this car. People have done gay things in this car. It's not going to judge you like a fucking Volkswagen would. Interesting facts: This car's exterior color is gray, but it's interior color is grey. In the owner's manual, oil is listed as "optional." When this car was unveiled at the 1998 Detroit Auto Show, it caused all 2,000 attendees to spontaneously yawn. The resulting abrupt change in air pressure inside the building caused a partial collapse of the roof. Four people died. The event is chronicled in the documentary "Bored to Death: The Story of the 1999 Toyota Corolla You wanna know more? Great, I had my car fill out a Facebook survey. Favorite food: spaghetti Favorite tv show: Alf Favorite band: tie between Bush and the Gin Blossoms This car is as practical as a Roth IRA. It's as middle-of-the-

When I ran the CarFax for this car, I got back a single piece of paper that said, "It's a Corolla, It's fine." Let's face the facts, this car isn't going to win any beauty contests, but neither are you. Stop lying to yourself and stop lying to your wife. This isn't the car you want, it's the car you deserve: The fucking 1999 Toyota Corolla. Google map of cars location

Never forget: 8 years ago a random person on Craigslist wrote the most effective ad for the Toyota Corolla, ever.

Wait, he was in Star Wars?!?!

Yeah, right. Good try. You have to get up *pretty* early in the morning, etc.

Instructing him to say “well done if you got this one at home” after every correct answer in class.