Iron Capt.

I heard Toby Keith cried when Kris Kristofferson stole his lunch money.

Time is a flat circle.

I can deal with rape allegations and leaking classified material to the press, but I draw the line at using bumper plates to claim a rawdog 315 bench at 45.

And an iron liver.

Tim Scott Right Now.

In hindsight, Judd Apatow owes Johan Hill an apology for this one.

The Trump-Kennedy Center operated as long as Trump Steaks (2 months.)

I am starting a Gen X speakeasy. The password is “Buster Douglas.”

GS-15 at DHS HQ. Special Advisor for Murder Cover Ups and Perjury.

Our initial analysis is up.

The video footage appears to show that the gun was taken away from the man before he was shot.

He was UNARMED before any of the shots were fired.

Treat the US government and ICE claims like you'd treat a Russian government claim after they've shot down an airliner or bombed a hospital. America 2026.

“If you don’t get killed in the army, you can learn a lot.” Mel Brooks on his service in WWII.

My wife is reading my daughter Little House on the Prairie. If we run out of food this weekend, I may have go deer hunting.

Just kidding. We might have to eat daddy’s emergency pizzas in the bottom of the freezer.

They Might Be Giants are now working on a song called “Greenland isn’t Iceland.”

You start doing the math on all the ways your life is different from your Grandpa. And working backwards…

Dog… I just hit the next one. Yeah, it’s a thing.

>the president has gone certifiably batshit insane and is deploying airborne brigades to U.S. cities to support his secret police while starting multiple conflicts and creating a crisis to annex the territory of an ally at the same time he’s renaming multiple government buildings after himself

It’s cool, guys. No way the navy finishes a new ship class in three years.

The Sacrifice of the Danes — The Atlantic After September 11, Denmark fought alongside its ally. The families of fallen soldiers have a message for Trump.

apple.news/Ab1IHpspTROu...

While not exactly germane to this excellent article, F*ck Gereshk.

I doubt Kristi Noem is a reader.

a man in a deadpool costume with two swords on his shoulder ALT: a man in a deadpool costume with two swords on his shoulder

Remember what Herodotus said about Greenland “You’ll never see a Danish flag on the moon, but GD they’re happy.”

Who could possibly have foreseen this?

/s

(Answer: Anyone whose knowledge of immigration-and-economics, especially through US history, extends beyond Jean Raspail's "Camp of the Saints.")

If NATO puts 1,000 troops in Greenland, we are back to the Suez Crisis.

Life moves pretty fast in Venezuela.

“Extra-judicial killing”

A murder by secret police in Minneapolis, the hub of the upper middle western province of Minnesota, has led to protests and increasingly heavy handed repression by state security services. Outside experts say this may be the spark that ignites a powder keg of simmering unrest against the regime

Didn’t we all learn from “Can’t Hardly Wait” that you can’t wear your own merch onstage?

Happy Aldrich Ames is dead day, to those who celebrate.