Jake Salazar 🏳️‍🌈

Day-drinking is defined holistically. It can happen at 1am or at any time.

You know when a trainer only has one pokemon you're about to face some Bullshit

Same. I have a Magikarp but I want to mix up my team and not go right for the Gyarados

I need to find a Drowzee

(Beartato and Reginald, in a museum, gaze upon the Mona Lisa) BEARTATO: There it is. The Mona Lisa. The most famous painting in history. REGINALD: Wow! What's it do? BEARTATO: It... what? REGINALD: Why's it famous? What's it do? (Beartato thinks.) BEARTATO: I don't know. REGINALD (to nearly museum employee): Excuse me! Sir? What's it do? EMPLOYEE: You're the first person to ask! Watch this! (The employee yanks a pull-string. Mona Lisa's eyes spin around and her mouth opens like a puppet) MONA LISA: Honk honk! Honk honk! (Everyone is delighted. This is true art.)

True Art

Hell yeah. Raichu is so good. I like to teach my Pikachu brick break but I've been holding off because I'm scared of using single-use TMs lol

Hell yeah. I was not leaving viridian forest without a Pikachu

I love food names I think they're so cute. This is also how I name the alley cats in my neighborhood

Butterfree is so powerful. My Weepinbell has been carrying my team tbh

I've been thinking about One Battle After Another and I'm still not sure if the movie was supposed to be sympathetic to the left or critical of the left. Political thought isn't given much screentime in the movie which is funny for a movie about leftist revolutionaries.

Never forget that this what The Washington Post said when Noem was nominated.

Lesbians of colour! If you are interested in working with me on a TTRPG project, please comment on the post below ⬇️

Beat Misty! Team check #pokemon

🥰 ty man

❤️

Thank you king ❤️

Another ten workouts logged in Strong. Been gaining weight and muscle

That's Gwenyth paltrow

I named mine Blue for the nostalgia hit

It sure looks like the City of St. Louis is poised to dive head-first off a fiscal cliff.

I'm worried when Kristi Noem finds out she's been fired she's going to become America's first obedience school shooter.

That Goldman sachs bro that was interviewed for Interview Mag

Kind of a serve ngl

No Kings includes Draft Kings

Thank you 💪 it was worth it

Made it to the gym today. Had to take the bus b/c my car is in the shop. Trying to focus on what I can control

Headline of a Q&A in New Yorker formatting Headline: A panicked middle-aged man refuses to tell me directions to the bathroom. Subhed: Please, I just have to pee. I'm in a hurry. By Isaac Chotiner March 4, 2026

Excuse me. Oh, God. Oh, no. Holy shit. Get away from me. I was wondering if you knew where the bathrooms are. Look, I'm ... it's not a crime to scroll through your high school girlfriend's Instagram account. We remained friends after high school! I was at her wedding! It's only natural to see how she's doing.

I'm in a bit of a hurry, and I'm afraid that if I choose the wrong corridor, I'll be late for my train. I think they're down that way, but I'm actually from out of town. Please stop talking to me.

Real quick, though. I agree that it's natural to be interested in an old friend, but aren't you afraid about the message you might be sending by liking a picture of her at the beach from 2015? If that did happen, and I'm only going off your word, it was probably an accident. They put the ... scroll bars or whatever ... close to the thumbs up button. People have been complaining about that for years. I've been complaining about that for years.

Nancy 3/4/26 💅

One of my watercolour studies of irises

One of my watercolour studies of irises
#watercolour #watercolor #iris #botanicalart

I have caught a Sandshrew and named him Donut