katie

been listening to a lot of Fuel again, please don’t tell my therapist

it’s not only perfectly acceptable but expected to be wine drunk for Thanksgiving and all 7 days around it. check your Bible

just started Pluribus last night and already arguing over whether it’s about Covid or about Woke. TV is so back, baby

what a joy it is to transition from “baseball hat to hide my dirty hair” season to “beanie to hide my dirty hair” season 🍂

I’ll also be releasing a Hamnet this Thanksgiving

me learning that buying the big block of cheese and shredding it by hand actually does make the pizza significantly better than using pre-shredded cheese: fuck. FUCK

if mamdani is so great, then why did i just eat an amount of halal cart shawarma a doctor would deem “unwise”??

I love New York and I’m sorry for all the stuff I said when the G train was delayed

if you are in line to eat your body weight in lamb shawarma at a halal cart STAY IN LINE!!! it’s really good

got a shout-out in the husband's movie review substack (imo every review should be about me) subscribe here: substack.com/@saltycinema

frizzy girls on the subway for zohran

an Election Day full of good news

answered the door to some Zohran canvassers and got to tell them that my husband wasn’t home because he was also out canvassing for Zohran ❤️

My congratulations to all Baseball Perverts. It was their "super bowl" last night and it seems they all had a very bad time (in their culture that's how you have a good time)

look at the fans behind home plate. this is why we don’t allow Canadians to have guns.

GET JIGGY WITH IT

I love baseball

Miguel Rojas I would like to buy you a second Van Cleef necklace

Miguel Rojas I’m sorry I said than Van Cleef necklaces are only for country club stepmoms and the meanest rich girl at a southern Baptist college

fun baseball fact: at 41 years old, Max Scherzer is the oldest man who has ever lived

christmas because I like da lights

me: does it increase your enjoyment of The Simpsons when I recite every line along with the show

husband [quietly]: yes dear

the game last night went on for so long that I actually learned some of the rules of baseball

baseball is the best sport cause you see a new great butt every minute

I have some great ideas for how the blue jays can still win this. for example, have they considered hiring Shohei Ohtani

yes daily movement and reading books and socializing have health benefits, but scrolling phone in bed has something even better: scrolling phone in bed

see, if I stay awake for the $2 worth of soda and $3 worth of snacks on my $400 flight, then the flight only REALLY cost $395

No. From now on, I will be extremely sober in Los Angeles.

LA is not a city, it’s 8 million cars in a trench coat

my candy-coated syringes have a special surprise the kids will never expect (syringes)