I have been on a self-imposed social media break for my mental health this week, and will return to it only after I say how happy I am for Kristi Noem that she will finally have more time to devote to her greatest passion: murdering defenseless animals.
And that's not counting my daughter, who snuck in after paying to see Zootopia 2.
But, I mean, it is kind of led by a shadowy cabal that sometimes does and covers up unspeakable things, so I think there are definitely arguments in both directions.
In that you aren't required to apologize for your various failures, that there are a multitude of different teams all trying to do the same thing but in slightly different ways, and that some of those orgs are geared toward profit instead of social justice, I'd say it's much more Prostestant-coded.
I'm sure Colby somehow got screwed out of a great season. Probably by the refs.
Fuck Bates as well. Nothing good comes out of Lewiston.
Hahahah, Fuck Bowdoin.
There are so many penalties imposed by society for being the kind of person who drives a Cybertruck.
- You’re fined $80,000
- You have to drive a Cybertruck
- Everyone sees you driving a Cybertruck
- The word “Cybertruck” is a central part of your life
- You become That Cybertruck Person
As always, if it's ok for our President and Israel's Prime Minister to forcibly remove the leader of another country from power, it's fair for them to do the same. And, in fact, is a good idea someone should look into.
Well, my new friend started calling me this morning, so I figured it was time to end our little dance. Here's the end of the "Kelly" saga for anyone still interested.
Make sure everyone asks Do Jeopardy! questions and nothing else.
Me: Good vibes are so important. At least that's what my grandkids say when they visit. I'm retired now. I used to be a stunt pilot in air shows, and sold a little real estate on the side. That's how I wound up in this great condo!
"Five miles a day? Wow! No wonder you're still 69 'young'! I can't promise that distance, but I do yoga, dance when I can, and surround myself with good vibes (winky face)
What do you do for a living? Sorry may i ask"
Octogenarians are not going to stream more spinoffs of SWAT and Blue Bloods.
Super weird, but entirely appropriate.
"A young 69? I like that attitude! Age is just a number when your spirit is strong, What's your secret?"
Me: I swim 5 miles a day in the ocean, maintain a positive attitude, and get as much Ivermectin as I can from my cousin who works at Tampa Bay Downs. What about you? How do you stay vivacious?
My God, I love that place. Great food, great drinks, great atmosphere and watched over lovingly by the real Mr. Baseball.
Two people already made the same joke I was going to make, Keith, so... I guess I'll just watch the video.
"Okay, Mr. History :) give me a hint , are we talking 60s or 70s?
I'm 38 years old"
Me: Fine. You wore me down, you vexing minx. I am 69 years young.
"BTW, how old are you? If you don't mind me asking"
Me: Why Kelly, it's not polite for a woman to ask a gentleman's age. Let's just say I remember when the first RFK was President.
"That's nice, i run a jewelry design company in Los Angeles. If you come to LA, I will also welcome you and invite you to have dinner together"
"Which part of Florida are you in? Have you ever traveled to Los Angeles before?"
Me: I live in Jacksonville right across the street from Shipwreck Island Water Park. I was in LA once, chasing my dreams of becoming a famous actor. It didn't work out because of politics and because of my face.
Me: You also seem like a nice and polite person. Perhaps you could rent one of these condominiums and we could go to the beach together and have a beautiful day.
"Oh no, that's not fair at all! If I were there, I'd definitely take you to the beach :) Florida beaches are too nice to miss."
Definitely not yet.
"You're welcome, where do you live?"
Me: Kelly, I live in a beautiful community in Florida with many condominiums. I own mine, but many of them are rented out a week at a time to families on vacation. I like these families, but they almost never take me to the beach with them! It makes me so sad.
"Thank you. You are a friendly person. There are not many polite people like you. If you are near California, I will buy you a cup of coffee to apologize"
Me: Oh dear, I'm nowhere near California. But thank you. I try to be polite and friendly, though sometimes it's hard. I have a terrible temper!
Ooh, I've never done this with a goal in mind before.
"I'm Kelly, Excuse me. Is this Lisa's phone number?"
Me: It is not
"Sorry I sent the wrong number. I hope I didn't disturb your beautiful day"
Me: Kelly, my day remains beautiful. Did you send a number? I don't see one.
Got a text from a random number that said "are you OK."
I have responded with "Almost never."
And now the game begins.
You never support me anymore, Marc. Especially when I'm at my craziest. It's really undermining our friendship.
