Matt

a man in a suit and tie is dancing with a woman in a white dress . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is dancing with a woman in a white dress .

Followed by the cafe I’m working in blasting the song that plays when Lindsay Lohan does her secret handshake with Martin the Butler in The Parent Trap (1998)

Gym is currently blasting In the Shadows by The Rasmus and I couldn’t be happier

I can hear an owl!!

LOVE dal

Why yes, there *is* a direct correlation between how many times I post online in one day and my general state of mental wellbeing, thank you for noticing!

Some of you haven’t been luxuriating in the process enough lately and it shows

Maybe next time

Oh! I thought the lemon added something. Housemate didn’t enjoy so much

I support all hands-free timer setting technology

“Might” was doing a lot of heavy lifting here…

I once heard someone say that using Siri to set a timer was an ick and couldn’t help but think there’s a person who doesn’t spend enough time in the kitchen with fresh ingredients

Might make a soup just to feel something

What in the heterosexual nonsense is going on in my bathroom?

Very much not a date 😂

Did I ever tell you about the time I accidentally started two small kitchen fires while cooking a goat’s cheese and leek quiche on St David’s Day because I had a very cute Welsh guy over for dinner and I got flustered because he was twirling around to Kate Bush and I didn’t know if it was a date? 🌼🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

Don’t tell me what to do

It works!!

Shooting your shot is a dying art and I’m out here reviving it one sloppy make out at a time

Also, wow I thought *I* was a yapper

Closely followed by “evil people shouldn’t be able to come into your life and decide you’re now going to be half of yourself”

Now I’m not one to cry in a live music environment, but Raye got me with “somebody loved me once, some day somebody will again”

Heartbroken to announce I got my hair looking quite nice™️ (I think) and it almost certainly isn’t gonna last till into the arena tonight

Lent is lowkey just religious locktober

Do you think anyone considered doing the boyfriend from The Devil Wears Prada for the drag race movie villains runway?

So you’ll never guess what

Adding a new citrus element to my signature lentil soup today, wish me luck

Happy Oh Mary! new casting announcement day to all who celebrate (London edition)

If I may be controversial yet brave, she absolutely would not; she’d stick to camel blues and marlboro reds and call anyone who vaped gay

From the same drag family as Tara Massalata

Drag name: Ramona Hummus