Sarah E. Matthews—Author Extraordinaire

My stomach gurgled and it sounded like a door opening in a haunted house.

If I wanted to explain things, I’d write hard Sci-Fi. I write weird fiction and I ain’t explaining jack. Why do weird things happen? Because they can.

Hello, book people! I am the book content editor for Reactor Mag and I'm looking for 2026 sci-fi, fantasy, horror, romantasy, and speculative books coming out in the second half of the year! If you have an adult or YA SFF/H book out July-Dec (or publicist), share the link/info here!

Dreamt I was trying to give my name and number to someone I liked and admired, and all I could do was make an interpretive painting with accompanying snarky text which did not include my name and number. Sounds about right.

Taking my meds with a Coke Zero and letting the caffeine and Xanax battle it out.

I had “My Kind of Town” by Frank Sinatra stuck in my head for like a month and I don’t know all the lyrics so my brain was just making shit up and getting it smashed up with “My Way”. It sucked. Just standing in the shower with my brain screaming “MY KIND OF TOWN CHICAGO IS!”

@theotherhappyplace.bsky.social have you seen this?

A line I wrote today that I’m happy with:
“The waiter stared at me as if I had committed some unpardonable sin by entering his domain.”

He moves like AI. I’m over here counting fingers on a supposedly real person because he’s so slick and unnatural.

I’m crying laughing at these comments, and would like to add (if it’s not already been said)
GUMP SAT ALONE ON A BENCH IN THE PARK/MY NAME IS FORREST HE’D CASUALLY REMARK/WAITIN FOR THE BUS WITH HIS HANDS IN HIS POCKETS/HE JUST KEPT SAYIN LIFE IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES

Bald eagles are endangered. Canada Geese are legion, and they will mess you up.

Jane Austen’s face on Stone Cold Steve Austin’s body. The caption on the pic reads Stone Cold Jane Austen and the caption above reads “BAH GOD ITS MR DARCY WITH A STEEL CHAIR”

Don’t know if this counts as a celebrity, but I mostly have pics of my cats

Officially, my gender is female, but unofficially, it’s two possums and a raccoon in a fabulous caftan.

Gotta love that my government job keeps trying to push AI on us. Microsoft Copilot to be exact. Like if I can’t write an email, I need to get a job that doesn’t involve writing emails and other business correspondence.

Check out my book Jubilation Grove and Other Nightmares! It’s got evil statues, crab monsters, unreliable realtors, the King in Yellow and more. Sate your appetite until my next book The Tea Party From Hell comes out in October.

a.co/d/9P08QzK

I spend too much time trying to write what I think other writers will admire. The words flow easier when I’m writing some bs that’s just for my entertainment.

Been running, fetching, catering to my dad’s needs for like two months now and he says to my mom, “you ever notice how crooked Sarah’s legs are?” I can’t even. I guess literally.

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

YOU CAN GET EVERY DISCWORLD TOME ON EBOOK FOR LESS THAN THE COST OF A SUBWAY FOOTLONG COMBO.

USUALLY GETTING EVERY SINGLE BOOK LEGALLY IS LIKE 400+

NOT.

A.

DRILL.

www.humblebundle.com/books/terry-...

lol my poor coworker has a client who’s telling her in detail about all 6 of his wives and that he’s looking for #7.

I couldn’t get a pic of it, but I passed a local food truck that had a mural painted on it of a taco holding a gun. Idk what that portends for their food.

Omg, this is legit one of my favorite movies. Dr T having a whole song about getting dressed in fabulous garb is life goals. Plus he’s kinda hot. And the mom’s outfits are gorgeous. Just an underrated movie.

A post from the Facebook group Thrifting Treasures. It ostensibly shows a stuffed orange cat with blotches of black on it like mold. Its heavy-lidded eyes are dead, its yarn whiskers are frazzled, and its expression foretells the heat death of the universe. The caption reads “Thrift store Garfield looking like Monday finally won”

It me.

I'm giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I'm giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.
#joke

Yep, many places employees will get in trouble if they don’t upsell, or sign up so many people for the rewards program. One of the many many reasons I hated working in retail.

I think my family is lowkey trying to stress me to death. And then when I’m dead, I still won’t have peace, because one of them will learn necromancy and bring me back because there’s just one more thing I need to do for them real quick.

Saw a person give in to their intrusive thoughts last night. Was stuck in stop and go traffic and the bridge. The person in front of me reached out their window and trailed their hand down the side of the semi truck next to us, like petting a dinosaur. 🦕

Profile of a chubby white woman with short reddish blonde hair and glasses. She is wearing earrings that are hissing black cat heads.

Wearing my festive Friday the 13th earrings.

He’s my hero. I want to be a professional irritant to bad guys. Just such a pain in the ass that they have no choice but to confess.

I’m dumb because I believe that if I’m kind, caring, and compassionate to others, they won’t be antagonistic towards me. But that ignores the fact that many people like to be assholes. Still, I strive to be those things because I believe they’re worthwhile.

I have been attracted to dudes my entire life, but nowadays, so many of them need to be punted directly into the sun that I’m beginning to question that attraction. Thankfully my boyfriend is excellent, but if we broke up, the dating scene looks bleak.