Stella Harris

It’s weird watching people talk
about the 6th anniversary of the pandemic like it’s over.

Her: “Where do the eggs go??” Me: “They just fly off willy nilly into the abdomen!!! Eventually they get reabsorbed. Serious body horror.” Her: “Cronenberg could never”

Had a hysterectomy in December. Just texted a friend, outraged, upon discovering I can still have cramps and PMS without a uterus. Followed by this lovely exchange:

Apparently, having had a hysterectomy is not a good enough reason for Walgreens to stop calling me every month to ask if I’m pregnant before filling my prescriptions.

But they went on to quote what nurses and substitute teachers make. Apparently to justify that I'm overpaid?? (While entirely missing the point that nurses and teachers are underpaid.)

The person saying all of this is a doctor. And of course they didn't quote their own salary in this discussion.

I was supposed to give a talk later this week, but the person hiring me just backed out. They said that upon further reflection, they can't afford me - it's just not in the budget for their event.

The conversation could (should) have ended there.

So glad you’re in Portland!

Positional asphyxiation can be fatal.

What does that mean? Basically that it’s harder to breathe in certain positions. Simply laying face down on the ground can create extra strain on your lungs, making it impossible for them to fully expand, and being bent backwards (such as in a hog tie) exacerbates this difficulty.

As a sex & kink educator, I don't always feel I have the expertise to meet the current moment. But apparently the safety risks of hog tying people have become relevant outside the dungeon/bedroom, so here we go:

Bondage comes with hidden risks, including nerve damage and positional asphyxiation.

An image to promote the rope bondage class.

Hey Portland, want to learn rope bondage? I’m doing a three week series this month: Rope 101, Rope 201, and a Rope Lab for practice. Starting next week, masks required!! forbiddentickets.com/events/stell...

Watch Cam | Netflix Official Site After a look-alike takes over her account, a cam girl with a growing fan base sets out to identify the mysterious culprit and reclaim her own identity.

For Spooktober I’m going to try to recommend a sleeper horror movie each day.

Today’s is ‘Cam’, which is not just a terrific horror movie — not just smart about what it explains and what it doesn’t — but also has quietly smart cultural politics about sex work.

Learn nothing, just jump in.

Covid is a social justice issue, especially now that governments have abandoned us in favour of “you do you” policies that leave the vulnerable by the wayside

Wearing a mask is a form of resistance

It protects your health & the health of your community

It says you don’t view others as expendable

The Kink Bundle - 30 experts in one bundle, background of toys.

It’s that time of year again! Just in time for Kinktober, you can get a ton of kink and BDSM classes for one low price. One of my classes is included, along with lots of other amazing educators.

Check it out: stellaharris--domsubliving.thrivecart.com/kink-bundle/

From the dungeon to the bedroom, asking for what you want. With Stella Harris. Image of Stella with a gloved hand in the foreground. Background image of a couple in bed.

I’m teaching a free online class on Tuesday, September 9th. (RSVP Required)

Come learn all about kink communication!

forbiddentickets.com/events/portl...

Yes. But to be fair the notes were largely a compilation of research from other sources. Only a little original writing. I’m still floored. I guess I really am in an echo chamber because I hadn’t even considered this possibility!

Advice needed! I’m working with someone on a research, writing, and performance project. They just dropped our notes into ChatGPT and produced a script. I’m completely horrified and it has sucked the joy out of something I was looking forward to. I’m also conflict avoidant. What do I do?

I’m reading a rental contract for an upcoming class. Included on the list of “prohibited items & activities” is “summoning of spirits.”

SUMMONING OF SPIRITS

Just snuck into the list alongside things like smoking and glitter.

I need to know what happened to prompt this inclusion.

Happy Summerween.

a man with a beard is smiling with the words writing is hard below him Alt: Chuck from Supernatural with the words writing is hard below him

Me, every time I try to incorporate suggestions from an editor.

*If you are visualizing this incident, you should know that I am wearing a flowy kaftan, no bra, and giant sunglasses.

Just intentionally bumped into a man at the grocery store because he was blocking the whole aisle and didn’t move when he saw me coming. (Thanks to the only benefit of peri-menopause: giving absolutely zero fucks.*)

I’ve been invited to a sexy PowerPoint play party. Yes, that’s exactly what it sounds like. PowerPoint presentations followed by sex. I feel like my entire life has been leading to this moment. (Super extra bonus, it’s a Covid cautious party with everyone doing plus life testing before unmasking!)

Tattoo of a nettle on Stella’s arm

Tattoo outline on Stella’s arm.

I’m not sure that tattoos are actually cheaper than therapy, but they are better for instant gratification! (Made by Stacy Fevinger.)

I worked in animal welfare for a decade and the only animal that left me with a permanent scar is a hamster.

The Damsel in Distress - Stella Harris When I teach a beginner’s rope bondage class, people always want to know what they can do with what they’ve learned. What kind of scene can they put together with just a few basic ties? And that’s…

The “damsel in distress” has captured imaginations all the way back to early myths and legends. If you're curious about "damsel in distress" style bondage, head over to the Twisted Monk blog where @stellaharris.bsky.social‬ talks about the how and why in THE DAMSEL IN DISTRESS.

Excited to being back my bisexuality class this year, along with the fab @millennialsexpert.bsky.social as a co-presenter! Grab your tickets for this online class: www.sheboptheshop.com/its-not-a-ph...

Goth squirrel on my patio.

82-year-old APS customer died after power was shut off in May 2024 An 82-year-old woman died in May 2024 after her power was cut off on a very hot day. Her son and an advocate say this shows an issue with state policies.

I have a deep aversion to local TV news, but now I am ON it because last year, the power company Arizona Public Service cut off electricity to my mother’s house outside of Phoenix, killing her.

Tell me the horror movie that started your love of horror