Joe Garland 🦋

A selfie of me in a st viateur bagel hat

What makes you think that?

Pursuant to U.S. Code Title 17 and applicable privacy laws, I do NOT authorize anyone wearing Meta smart glasses to record, scan, or analyze me in public places. This includes when I am purchasing antifungal cream, extra-small condoms, or the book “Sex for Dummies.” This post serves as notice

Would anybody like to make some jokes about all the people who perished on 9/11?

Pursuant to U.S. Code Title 17 and applicable privacy laws, I do NOT authorize anyone wearing Meta smart glasses to record, scan, or analyze me in public places. This includes when I am purchasing antifungal cream, extra-small condoms, or the book “Sex for Dummies.” This post serves as notice

Losing my shit thinking about a Buffalo-based Jimmy Eat World cover band named Jimmy Eat Buffalo

I keep a whole chest freezer of these lil bastards

I’m just saying that when you come for disinformation, you come for my posts, and I will not stand idly by 😤

This is why I always vote for my buddy dave

“Wah the internet is awash with disinformation” there is literally nothing stopping you from logging off and getting all your news from The Old Farmer’s Almanac

Losing my shit thinking about a Buffalo-based Jimmy Eat World cover band named Jimmy Eat Buffalo

Jane Goodall ass founding father

you do not have to hand “it” (an ikea catalog) to him

To think this all could have been avoided if Jimmy had just stopped eating when he was finished with Ohio

Having problems with my toenails. They just keep growing. Would love to find my community

Google Translate implies the existence of Stopignore Cisearly

oh wow small world, my mom slept with peabo bryson and got him to call off his wedding

I hope every town in BC picks a slightly different time.

PARENTS: talk to your kids about “clumping”, the latest trend among teens. They’re eating balls of kitty litter and hot dog water. Or putting clumps of spoiled lunchables in hand dryers and huffing the fumes. I’m not sure which exactly but it’s almost definitely disgusting

semen

Come to buttheaf

Sometimes when I like a post it’s only because my life’s tapestry is all the richer for having read whatever stupid garbage you wrote

🤯🥶😩

Having problems with my toenails. They just keep growing. Would love to find my community

how, how would you even, where does, you can just, it's code online, and on billions of bits of storage media out there, there's, it's- you can just build it from scratch, if you have to, from the code, and the documentation, i dont, it doesn't work like, it, its - that's; how ,, what?

aag
huh???

I’m addicted to politihol

Im on phone right now. On phone is Labor

A small cartridge of packaging tape I bought at the post office or whatever instead of them just giving me some tape and baking the cost into their pricing, thus reducing plastic waste and eliminating the need for me to post on a goddamn Tuesday morning

Maybe not my biggest capitalism concern, but I really hate having seventeen of these motherfuckers

DADDY I TOOK AN EGG AND PUT IT ON THE FLOOR AND CRACKED IT ON THE FLOOR AND MADE IT YELLOW AND MOMMY CLEANED IT UP AND MOMMY WAS UPSTAIRS

Mommy was upstairs? So nobody cleaned it up?

I MADE MY EGG YELLOW

Marx’s indictment of structurally mediated constraint remains the most analytically durable repudiation of imma stop you right there homie, when I want to work this hard I just pick up a book

A small cartridge of packaging tape I bought at the post office or whatever instead of them just giving me some tape and baking the cost into their pricing, thus reducing plastic waste and eliminating the need for me to post on a goddamn Tuesday morning

Maybe not my biggest capitalism concern, but I really hate having seventeen of these motherfuckers