yeah ok

Computer: your password has been compromised

Me: so has the presidency of the United States. im sure everything will be fine

The purpose of the "alternative" Super Bowl halftime show is a celebration of racism. That's it. It's "revenge" for a Puerto Rican man being selected to perform.

Any excuse or fake explanation by any performer participating in it is utter bullshit.

Having puppy fever something fierce. Might not make it through this time.

I'm almost wishing for an alien invasion. We could use some good news.

Overworking myself to an early grave because ew feelings nope

Long ago, in a time before everyone was tired of everything

I'll decide when I have dallied long enough. I love to dally.

I love a “fuck it ima do it” kinda woman

to boost ratings they’re playing the super bowl around a bad bunny concert

please use alt text

please turn on the feature to require it so you don’t forget

please flex your writing skills and describe the picture. you don’t need to be Tolkien but you can do better than “my cat.” i believe in you

they should invent a body that doesn’t need to be turned over over and over like a rotisserie chicken when you sleep

putting a little hot sauce on my tax return and crossing my fingers

Thanks for the follow, good luck finding anything worth sharing.

would you like to meet up somewhere in the woods and just scream

we could get coffee after

unclenched my jaw and evaporated

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but eat an orange also because scurvy is nothing to joke about.

Coffee and sex on Sunday because like Jesus said: ground and pound, or something like that.

I’m very classy. One of society’s elite, to be sure.

Suckling at the teat of ennui.

As two things we rely on for our immediate survival, it’s shocking how horrible humans treat air and water.

Gonna go scream in the woods for a bit, anyone wanna come with?

Netflix and snack under the full moon

final stage of acceptance that I will never spell sillouette correct on the first attempt

I love witches and vampires but only the sexy ones

pumpkin spice hemorrhoid cream

Trump’s biggest accomplishment is making George W Bush look good in comparison

Taxes are over-complicated and scary but at least if you screw up, you only go to jail