john

I said the phrase "ex post facto vibe drop" and had to double check I wasn't having a stroke

So this is the most insane thing I've ever seen

Have had one glass of wine and just severely overpronounced the name of the local hardware store, let's get weird

Now accepting apologies from anybody who told me the Sixers would be different this year

To be clear it was because I was sent a thank you for a campaign I feel bad for not donating to

@wyattyhalpert They're giving He-Man pronouns @jondelarroz Now they're making a Masters of the Universe and giving He-man pronouns. These people won't stop until they ruin everything.

They're giving He-Man pronouns

@opg.bsky.social what did you do

Nope!

My D&D character tonight

I have moved without movers for the last time

My DJ name

We need to amend the constitution to make assassinating the president legal

It is Pokemon Day

Michael Caine

I will personally cover the damages if this turns out to NOT be insurance fraud

Moving is like adult finals week. I'm either working the hardest I ever have in my life or trying to fit as much beer in my person as possible

The PA gubernatorial election is not a swing election

How much genocide do you consider an acceptable amount to support

Marie Kondo left a note on my car

This is perfect snowman snow if you're got any whimsy about you

Breaking a PB&J down into its macros is a real "lost the plot" moment. By this metric a Chipwich is bad

Sinophobia, nice job guys

Should be on NBCSP, yeah

It's crazy to me that there are people who don't live in Philadelphia. Who told you that you were allowed to do that

I'm rooting for Robert Mueller

No bar in the world ever has worse service than any given Dave and Busters bar

Signed up for a storage unit and while showing me around the facility the guy asked me what my "storage journey" is

You named your newspaper after a make-believe job

At quizzo the other night I asked what Palpatine's first name was and someone yelled out "Somehow!" so at least that's something

A stick of string cheese topped with shredded mozzarella

Yes chef