born miserable

it should be socially acceptable to lick your plate clean if the meal was so good it moved you to do so

a white couple and she’s holding a big fish. he kind of looks like he’s taking her from behind but they both have their jeans on so… this is an odd looking couple but i admire their clueless and carefree attitude towards life

it’s finally friday let’s get freaky

Heroes (David Bowie acoustic cover) YouTube video by Half a Person

from the archives: because what the hell anymore:

youtu.be/8w6nP4wGbTs?...

THINK before you dm, fam (rip Imahara)

March 8 on the calendar where it is printed: "International Women's Day" and "daylight saving time begins (clocks forward)

Thank you for having International Women's Day on the shortest day of the year

okay but if she ever joins Bluesky I will be the unofficial wingman and be like HEY RACHEL [lights myself on fire] YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS HOT [points at Lauren while I turn to ashes]

Knock off toilet it looks like Darth Vader and a football uniform called star power warrior with silver boots and a red light saber between his leg

Hey "Space Power Warrior," is that your lightsaber, or are you just happy to see me?

the only artistic growth I will get behind

I honestly think it rules that Rachel Weisz became huge at 29 with The Mummy, did almost exclusively serious/artsy films for two decades, and then as soon as she hit her mid-40s was like "I will now only play characters who are bisexual and, like, IMPOSSIBLY horny."

(This is about her new show.)

I'm always confused by people who block me for limiting replies.
It's like, "So you, too, actually DO believe in users' rights to set boundaries for who interacts with them?"

Donate to Support Hannah’s Breast Cancer Journey to Healing, organized by Hannah Mey My name is Hannah, and I am a 37-year-old wife, mother, and nurse who has… Hannah Mey needs your support for Support Hannah’s Breast Cancer Journey to Healing

After many sweet people requested me to get a GoFundMe set up I finally did it. Still feels weird posting this, but I appreciate any help.

gofund.me/1e496d3b0

My morning repost. (Sorry again about filing your TL with these). I understand if you unfollow me

delete your account and delete your publication, hell, delete your existence too

The New York Times just well ackshually reply guy'd lmaoooo

You have to admit, Jesus was super-chill for a cult leader.

roses are red
violets are ethereal,

Who are you going to believe, the world, or your lying government?

Freaked out cat hides behind plant

Freaked out cat hides behind Bubly

Freaked out cat has been traumatized for life

Me during the opening credits of Marty Supreme

if you need anything, let me know I HAVE SPOKEN

Lucky to have this guy as my writing partner. He gets to do the coolest stuff!!

captain anxious and the anxieteers

Beard thread: post ‘em if you got ‘em!

this is wonderful news and much needed in a time of absolute garbage everywhere else TEAM JORDAN so glad for you and rooting for you always I HAVE SPOKEN

BREAKING: Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem has died during a scheduled rhinoplasty. she was 54. according to the hospital staff, dogs disguised as a surgical team mauled Noem, later found foaming at the mouth. Noem leaves behind Corey Lewandowski, who deserves to be left behind anyway.

a woman in blue n95 mask and a blue dress with xray equipment behind her

got approved for a new hip today and i’ve been trying to get this done since 2021 so like BIG DEAL. huge. surgery scheduled the week after my bday - best present ever 🦿

uh oh, who now

hell hath no fury like a bluesky moderator or staff member who’s been slightly offended

Buddy, that weight isn't going to move itself