Paul 🏳️‍🌈

Dear Shabana, I notice today that you referred to me in your speech on immigration at the IPPR think tank. You said: “A party leader should not be on the beaches of France encouraging people to make a perilous crossing on small boats.” I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised especially after the hateful Labour campaign in Gorton and Denton, but this is just the latest in a string of lies peddled by a discredited Government who intentionally fan the flames of racism and division. When I went to Calais, I was not there to encourage people to travel to the UK. I was there to see at first hand the suffering your Government and successive Governments have done in demonising migrants in a pathetic bid to pander to the base instincts of Reform and the flawed strategy of Morgan McSweeney. As you will know, if you even bothered to research my visit instead of taking Reform talking points, I was there to witness the brutality of families living in tents in freezing temperatures. I filled water tanks and picked up litter. What that visit did do is confirm my belief that if we are to smash the boat gangs and stop the boats, we need to offer safer and managed routes for migrants to come to this country. Showing compassion as a politician is not a crime. In fact, we need to see much more of it. It reminded me of a young MP who in October 2015 spent three days in Lesbos helping migrants fleeing war-torn Syria. She posted videos on X, talked about handing out water and croissants to refugees and food parcels. When she returned to the UK, she wrote a very moving piece in the New Statesman. She said “we have to work with our European partners and create new, safe, and legal routes for refugees to get to Europe. We cannot abandon them to their fate, left as prey for smugglers whilst risking death on the seas.” She said “maybe we can make ourselves feel better by saying no-one is making them get on the boats. And again, the Home Secretary is not entirely wrong when …

Dear Shabana,

Let's clear some things up around migration and remember we're talking about people's lives.

Sorry I'm not more open-minded about LLMs, it's just some fucking maniacs shoveled out a bunch of useless bloatware featuring that technology, did not give me any chance to opt out, reorganized the entire economy around it, zeroed out gains made by green energy, and made it impossible to buy RAM

How Much I Dislike the Daily Mail    I would rather  eat Quavers that are six weeks stale,  blow dry the man bun of Gareth Bale,  listen to the songs of Jimmy Nail,  than read one page of the Daily Mail.    If I was bored  in a waiting room in Perivale,  on a twelve-hour trip on Network Rail,  halfway through a circumnavigational sail,  I would not read the Daily Mail.    I would happily read  the autobiography of Dan Quayle,  1001 Things You Can Do With Kale,  selected scripts from Emmerdale, if it meant I didn’t have to read the Daily Mail.    Far better to  stand outside in a storm of hail,  scratch a blackboard with a fingernail,  be swallowed by a humpback whale,  than have to read the Daily Mail.    If I was blind   and it was the only thing in Braille,  I still would not read the Daily Mail.    Brian Bilston 

Today’s poem is called ‘How Much I Dislike the Daily Mail’.

Nasty bug

No! Some of us think they're rank! And yes mum I have tried them...

John Davidson Gives First Interview and Explains Tourette’s Tics After Shouting N-Word and Other Slurs at BAFTAs: ‘I Felt a Wave of Shame’ (EXCLUSIVE) John Davidson's explains Tourette's tics and the BAFTA N-word incident in his first exclusive interview with Variety.

Fantastic interview. Everyone should read it:

if a shark bites you, you should turn into a shark why do only vampires wield such power

Sorry to get radical but I don’t think it’s my job or yours to embrace, accept, understand - and certainly not to use - the thing being sold to us as AI. I don’t like any part of it, so I won’t. I’m missing out? Good, that’s what I want. You’re worried about me missing out? That’s fuckin weird, man.

To anyone that needs clarification, "your best" is what you can accomplish without damage to your physical, mental and emotional health, not what you can accomplish by destroying them

Skeletor Reacts To The He-Man Movie YouTube video by Tom Christie

Funny

Illustration of a cute cartoon shark with big naturals. Caption reads “boobie shark doo doo doodoo doodoo”

I’ve had this curséd image in my head for over a week so now I’m making it everybody’s problem

1 [Scene is a GREGGS interior. A lone MAN, the only customer in the shop, is standing at counter] MAN: Please can I have a sausage roll. 2 GREGGS SHOP ASSISTANT: Certainly sir [She pulls a leaver on the panini machine and WOOSH the man disappears through a trapdoor]. Whoosh 3 [The MAN appears through a chute in an underground bunker. A voice from off-scene greets him]: Welcome, friend 4 [We see the voice is of a military-looking resistance COMMANDER with a moustache] COMMANDER: You said "please can I have" instead of “can I get”… So now you're one of us. 5 MAN: W-where am I ...? [We see him looking at a hi tech UNDERGROUND MILITARY BUNKER - it has resistance vibes, and has lots of screens with maps etc] 6 COMMANDER: You've joined the resistance… ...against people saying things all American. 7 COMMANDER: We are an underground network of sleeper agents poised to have a right go at young people the moment they say "mom" or "bangs”. 8 LIEUTENANT [Staring at screen]: Agent 244 has just given a Zoomer in Halifax the “could/couldn't care less" speech, sir COMMANDER: Very good 9 [Show the map of the UK with digital pop ups on it saying ‘GOTTEN’, ‘ZEE’, ‘MATH’ etc COMMANDER: You may have heard our name... We are... 10 COMMANDER: ...the Fight Against New Yankee Pronunciations and Americanisms Corrupting the King's English! 11 [Show the military command center panel. It says on the wall in big metal letters]: F.A.N.Y.P.A.C.K.E. 12 MAN You've called yourselves the 'Fanny Pack' COMMANDER: We didn't spot the acronym [/end]

This took me fucking ages

The Claudia Wickerman (1973)

🥚

*WISHES REALLY HARD*

The promo is already top notch:

Vulfmon & Zachary Barker - Disco Snails (Official Video) YouTube video by Vulf

"Mother," said the Child, "I have discovered a song."

The song:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAZB...

Graham Kritzer (@GrahamKritzer) on twitter: "Guy inventing Accordion: I'm gonna make this suitcase so fucking loud"

‘Defecting to the reform party’ is a polite euphemism for telling guests at a dinner party that you need to go for a poo.

“I’d love to hear all about your holiday in Sardinia but first I just need to defect to the reform party”

Phil Collins isn’t his real name. It’s a sussudionym

🎶 "... I said may-be,
I'm sure he ordered chips with gra-vy..." 🎶

Supermarket cucumber display with sign reading “CUCUMBERS can help reduce constipation.”

i hope the first one works because i just don’t think i can fit a second one in there

So disappointed in him - I had such high hopes when Labour won 😔

A tiny little floofy white dog that looks like it weighs five pounds sopping wet sits very polite looking slightly nervous in a little clear raincoat with blue pipping. Next to a foot ignore the foot

Me waiting for the bus omw to kick your ass

Cartoon bird roasting a marshmallow Life is like roasting a marshmallow. It takes time and patience. You have to Keep it moving, so it cooks evenly. F*Ck%NG $H*t!

Good morning, kids.
Be safe out there. 🥰

A 21 year-old gymnast from Azerbaijan landed the worlds first full “full” this year at the World Games in Chengdu, China: #AGoodPlace

Source: www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsi...

A photo of two pages from The Wonderful World of Ladybird Books for Grown-Ups by Jason Hazeley and Joel Morris. It shows images of classic Ladybird children’s books which have been given different text. In this case it’s the fairy tale rumplestiltskin, featuring an illustration of the small title character. The book is now titled Jools Holland Hootenany. Text on the other sample pages reads “Coming up now, fresh from their North American tour, the fabulous Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings," said the little man, dancing on the spot No more," cried the princess. "No more music." But the music would not stop. The princess was so very tired that she feared her heart would stop. "No more, please," she begged. But the little man said his magic words again. "Boogie-woogiel" laughed the little man. "Boogie-woogie!" And the music did not stop. The caption reads Stories of Britain's colourful and mysterious rituals were always popular with overseas readers.

Happy New Year’s Eve! Hootenanny!

🎵”Suss-suss-sausages”🎵