tessa thornton

no one is talking about the “i wanna do it MYSELF mommy”-to-“oops! i spilled” pipeline but it’s a pervasive phenomenon

it’s super awkward! i’m starting to get the hang of it but i often do english for ribbing

something i never really thought about before having a toddler is that i bet it’s really fun to drive a skidsteer

it’s fucked up to hear kids quoting a key and peele skit. that’s like peak obama era elder millennial humour.

worst overtime losses i’ve experienced in the last 6 months:
1. world series g7
2. men’s gold medal hockey game
3. womens gold medal hockey game
4. bills divisional round
5. world series game 3

legitimately been waiting for someone to do macarthur park for years so pretty thrilled that it was as good as I imagined. But now my answer is “dim all the lights” by donna summer

my son does in fact love curling or “crashing rocks” as he calls it

if my toddler is going to continue to wake me up at such ungodly hours he’s going to learn to enjoy watching winter sports with me for two weeks. hope you like curling, son

i just use heading 2 for everything but it feels Wrong and then what happens when i've used up 2 and 3 and have to rethink my entire hierarchy because now i've gone too far?

"Heading 1" in google docs is Too Big

i currently have 12yo’s two friends trapped at my house until they plow the side streets so lesson learned to not permit sleepovers the day before a snowstorm

I appreciate that I can fully understand mark carney's rudimentary french

i’m not a seahawks fan in general but i am an enjoyer of the Sam Darnold Project

that’s enough season-ending overtime losses for me tbh

yeah people are so bold it's actually unbelievable.

spent my winter break in an extremely me-in-my-early-20s way in that i watched a lot of star trek and did a lot of knitting. but there were a lot more kids and a lot less day drinking

also someone will always ask "did this show up on pregnancy scans" which is fucked up in a lot of ways (and ignoring the fact that its mostly americans who could not terminate following a 20 week ultrasound anyways)

no i don't think they're really thinking through what they're advocating (which is eugenics or murder) but they feel comfortable expressing that they don't think they or their children should have to live in a society with disabled people ("these kids pmo" being one of the LESS disturbing varieties)

there's a lot of horrific shit on tiktok but the worst shit I see is commenters being FURIOUS at parents who have disabled children. like for the fact that their children were born and raised and allowed to exist in society.

i am actually very ok with the bills not making a deep playoff run. last year’s AFC championship was stressful and i haven’t recovered from the world series yet

watching star trek with a toddler is fun as he tries to make sense of sci fi scenes with his limited vocabulary. the inside of a borg cube is “green subway station”

or grey cup champion quarterback, nick

also the trains are so petty and bitchy

toddler has been watching the original thomas and friends and the ethics of running a railroad with sentient trains are deeply troubling

a dump truck fell on its side at a nearby construction site and was left on its side all day. huge day for my two year old

i believe that billy believed that was a real thing

lucky i’m keeping my yacht rock takes to myself

sorry for billy joel posting

the tiktok pianoman trend has reignited an old debate in my relationship about the “tonic and gin” line. i maintain it’s fine

i got really good at it during the pandemic but the shoulder burn never stopped