xtina

return to Oz? yeah we should rewatch The Monkey 😏

eating while standing at the counter is unc

woman with hands on temples

how it feels when your run out of stuff to say but want to say more stuff

If you're old enough to have watched .hack//Sign you should probably be more worried about .back//Pain

when i was a teen with a macbook, my lil bro would sneak up and quickly use the keyboard shortcut to open my Applications folder, then hit ⌘-A and ⌘-O

i will never ever watch cheers!!!!!

miles edgeworth shrugging smugly at gone girl

if miles edgeworth was in gone girl, it wouldn’t have gone down like that

husband confirmed for my valentine 😌🫡

i hope it’s fool’s spring soon, i love looking like an idiot for enjoying being outside

i love to delete! i love to delete anything i can get my sticky lil fingers on!

the goat (brian wilson) with a goat (animal)

showing up to a new job with brian wilson bangs because i can’t really be bothered to cut them 😌

i made a version of wikipedia you can doomscroll
xikipedia.org

smokey eye undefeated by snow 😌🖤

breathing hard or hardly breathing?

they should call it egg drop gloop 🤤

going zig zag mode on the sidewalk

what the hell are the golden globes

ah please, son of sam is my son. you can call me sam

the yoga instructor tells me to engage my core. i toggle the swtich and feel my power levels rising. core engaged. plasma vents at 34%. within minutes my shoulder mounted turbo canons will be armed. namaste.

every NYT headline is like…They expected pee: poo greeted them instead

say hello to your little friend? i’d love to, he sounds great

i will never “set my SSID to boingo hotspot”

“you can’t pause dark souls” sounds like a lie invented by boyfriends

clocking in for my first day as a senior shambler at the dark souls III castle, hope i don’t ge- AEURRRUUHRRGGHHH

I'm not the girlfriend...I'm the friend that girled up

“try to avoid snacking after dinner” okay then I will starve to death in the night. good bye

just found out that the guy from Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea was just going horizontally???

vibing out to the washing machine’s song 😌 totally forgetting it’s telling me to come move the laundry

missed opportunity to use the word “sniff”

They said im in the top 1% of listeners to women