Bruce Duncan - Voiceover

Well now I’m confused. And wet #StormBenjamin

A mug of latte, with some homemade ‘latte art’. The design of milk froth and coffee is, errr, well, a bit rude. Or maybe just a bit shit.

A cup of latte, with a seahorse design made from the frothy milk and coffee

Personally, I think my #LatteArt is coming along well.
My wife thinks the local coffee shop are better… I’ll leave you to decide which is which.

I’m not going to France. In fact, I shall probably have to stump up some of my own cash to pay the full bill if I opt for the croissant. 😳

Screenshot of a message confirming that I’ve won £7.60p on EuroMillions. Woop Dee Woo.

I shall enjoy a coffee and croissant at a local French Café. I will not be taking further questions at this time.

A Saluki Sighthound, lying on her back, in her fluffy donut bed, in a position known as ‘roaching’, with her back legs splayed apart, and her front legs fully extended into the air. A very relaxed state.

Draw me like one of your French girls, Jack #Saluki #Sighthound #Roaching

NOT tested on animals you say? 🤷‍♂️
“In tests, 8 out of 10 cats preferred…” Wait… What? 😳

I did a thing. On a podcast. @hdystpodcast.bsky.social
Why not take a listen if you’ve got 34 minutes? (Or listen at 1.25x if you’ve only got 27 minutes) In all the usual podcasty places, including your smart speaker.

I wonder how the Golf of Mexico and Mount Denali are feeling this morning 🤷‍♂️

A pair of cheap reading glasses in (almost) every room in the house!! 🤓

hundred & ten percent THIS 👆

I don't really tend to record audiobooks as a rule, but if you want to send me an email to info (+my handle) I can take a look. If I can't help, I can probably put you in touch with others who can.

A screenshot of my Apple Health stats for exercise, showing my average is 1 minute per day better than last year. That’s a whole 350 minutes more exercise than 2023, and I’ve not even been trying! 😳

Well, GO ME!!

UPDATE: iPhone minutes ≠ washing machine minutes.

An iPhone minute is approximately 3-4 earth minutes. Washing machine minutes may exceed 1 hour*

*Ts &Cs apply.

What is the cut-off point though? 70? 75? 🤷‍♂️ Or is it simply determined by the reaction of others? Laughter = fell over. OMG, you ok? = had a fall.

Photo of the display from an older iPhone which is transferring data to a newer iPhone. It’s saying ‘time remaining: about 1 minute’

I suspect this will be like one of those ‘washing machine minutes’… 🫤

It's a shame she never thought of "and isn't it just bollocks?" It's 3 syllables, so it fits just fine:

A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife....
...
And isn't it just bollocks, don't you think?

For anyone in the UK, If you text ‘SHOUT’ to 85258 when you are in a dark place or suicidal, a trained crisis volunteer will text you back. This is great If you find talking on the phone challenging. It’s completely free 24/7. Please Repost, you never know who might need this support

‘King’ journeys?

What’s your daily/weekly mileage though. We’ve had ours < 2yrs. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve had to queue for a top up charge. But admit, I’m within Greater London so more chargers. Small change to routine/way of thinking helps.

Also waves hand. We’re lucky to have a driveway so can charge up while I sleep. Can have a ‘full tank’ every morning if I choose. V cheap overnight kw rate =2p/mile vs my old diesel that was 27p/mile. Saving £200/month on fuel. Also, less to go wrong with it, so saving on repairs. No oil. No exhaust

If you’ve got a receipt saying paid, I’d ask for a refund. 🤪

That would have made the Scratchcard advert quite different, wouldn’t it!

“I brought the scratchc…oooh Good God! That’s ruined Christmas” 🤣

Add some play to Christmas with Scratchcards from The National Lottery YouTube video by The National Lottery

Here you go! Don’t be shy. ☺️ And ‘comfortably proportioned’ works better 😃Or just ‘the first person you hear’ 😘 youtu.be/I9jmwE_lEX0?...

a woman with her hair in a mohawk and a red shirt . Alt: Cameron Diaz, in a gif from ‘Something about Mary’ where Mary has fashioned her hairstyle with some ‘special hair gel’ that Ted had on his ear.

I heard that some have started using ‘Skeeting’ as a portmanteau of Sky and tweet, but it already has a very different meaning (DON’T look it up!!), so I’m not sure it’ll catch on.

Many years ago, I went into a toilet that had a video screen above the urinal with, I seem to remember, Dani Behr (remember her!) looking down at you. 😳 Most unnerving.

Left a bit... Right a bit... AIM! PEEEEEE!
Don't forget to wash your hands you dirty B*****d.

(Not the actual script but, am I right? 😂)

Did it get rid of the waxy residue? 👂🫣

bsky.app/profile/cold...

screenshot of statistics from bruceduncan.net website showing most popular days and most popular times that people viewed. Wednesday and 2pm being most popular

Apparently, 2pm on Wednesday is the most popular time to be looking at my website.... bruceduncan.net 🤷‍♂️

With salted caramel gelato? 😜