She's a real space cadet. Incredibly intelligent, hell of a pilot. No surprise she made it into Astronaut School.
03.03.2026 04:59
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*sensing a single loose hair somewhere on my body* I am superhuman
01.03.2026 15:58
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It has come to my attention that my loud coworker is days away from having a nuclear weapon
03.03.2026 03:37
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No one wants my Board Of Peace collector plates.
03.03.2026 04:31
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Trump is one TIA away from being the next Andy Kaufman.
02.03.2026 16:59
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this meeting could've been a Walker Texas Ranger clip show
02.03.2026 03:40
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Posies. Duh!
02.03.2026 04:04
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Amen!
01.03.2026 18:58
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Wow, if this is just the lobby, imagine what the hobby STORE is like
01.03.2026 18:01
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Mar-a-Lago is going to be the loveliest landfill one of these days
01.03.2026 18:06
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i shot the sheriff. all my homies hate the sheriff.
01.03.2026 05:08
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storefront sign, all it says is SHOE LIQUIDATION
fascinated by imagining what goes on in this building
01.03.2026 05:14
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No thanks. If I wanted to hear an old man lie to me about how great of a job he’s doing, I’d go to church
24.02.2026 13:07
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If you don’t think a name can shape your life, remember that Squirrelfucker Adams was Ansel’s much more talented brother.
23.11.2023 00:59
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Yes, that’s why my family left Germany because they really wanted to go to Great Britain and sort of missed it by thaaat much
15.02.2026 16:38
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Welcome back to Dogs With Knives. Meet Nimoy. Nimoy is a two-year-old possible Cavalier Pekinese mix, but that’s not the only mystery about Nimoy. The other mystery is where he got a partially serrated matte black 8-inch tactical folding blade. Let’s see what he can do with it.
26.02.2026 05:18
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they gotta invent a sport called Hawkey. predator birds swooping in and stealing the puck, screaming, clawing your face. they have to do it. they must
26.02.2026 05:27
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you know how no one says "I can't come to the phone right now" anymore
they took that from you
26.02.2026 05:39
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usa men’s hockey team eating shit
the look of defeat after winning gold
26.02.2026 05:50
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Listerine kills germs so it's okay to spit it on people
26.02.2026 07:24
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Shocked at poor turnout for my 20th century poetry class and its promise to "take you to Ezra Poundtown."
26.02.2026 08:33
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boss said if i catch 22 fish i get a raise but if i catch more than 20 i’m fired
26.02.2026 09:54
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when you say “ill eat dog shit for lunch if i have to” two years before we’ve even heard what’s on the menu, it kinda makes it sound like you *want* to eat dog shit for lunch. and unless you’re trying to convince everyone to eat dog shit, maybe spend some time thinking about some other options, k?
22.02.2026 02:44
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It’s good to go 19th-century from time to time. I have been obsessing about the length of candle wicks, for example.
26.02.2026 13:51
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When you taste my outfit, you will note that it's distinctly clown-forward
25.02.2026 18:42
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"what's your fucking problem"?
- me as a couples intimacy counselor
25.02.2026 20:52
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I blame the TED Talk for introducing the concept that people in tech should talk.
25.02.2026 21:03
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It's crazy that as a child, I was shown a wealthy duck who swam in his own coins, and I thought "Wow- billionaires are really disgusting".
25.02.2026 21:18
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I only read authors who were conceived in a jacuzzi
25.02.2026 23:31
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We regret to inform you that the last sandwich you ate was most likely haunted.
We wish you luck in your new life going forward.
25.02.2026 23:11
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