Derek (Not Derrick)

I don’t know if this counts as funny, but that’s why he blocked me too 😫

He said “Mission nearly accomplished”

How long were you Mullin on that?

Wake me up when September ends.

Logging in to make a parlay bet that there will be nuclear war in the next two years and Polymarket will survive said war.

It’s absolutely #3, but you have to get the metal bodied ones with the black clicky top. The plastic ones are good, but the metal ones are elite.

I feel like Keyser Soze was too

What’s your favorite movie about World Significant Military Operation II?

For me it’s between Saving Private Ryan and the perpetually forgotten Dunkirk.

The Dow still hasn’t gotten back to 50,000 hahaha

Hey hey hey does that $26 million Calvin Ridley cap hit mean nothing to you?

Wait, why are they punching back?

Punching everyone I see in the face because they might punch me in the face. It’s called proactively punching defensively, look it up.

Joe Mazzulla Reiterates Jayson Tatum Will Not Return Until He Passes The ‘Mazzulla Logic-Puzzle Meridian’ Celtics Star To Remain Sidelined While Grappling With Serpent’s Cipher

Joe Mazzulla Reiterates Jayson Tatum Will Not Return Until He Passes The ‘Mazzulla Logic-Puzzle Meridian’ https://theonion.com/joe-mazzulla-reiterates-jayson-tatum-will-not-return-until-he-passes-the-mazzulla-logic-puzzle-meridian/

Is it “Midnight in Chernobyl”? What a read that one is.

Real question is why did it stop?

Robert California would be a main character in the files.

It was that droop. That damn droop.

Part of Dali’s “Persistence of Memory” that depicts our big beautiful good boy President

Looking very good and healthy, sir.

I appreciate your integrity, pee or ~pee

Is there kalshi action for this?

a man swinging a golf club on a golf course with the words now watch this drive above him ALT: a man swinging a golf club on a golf course with the words now watch this drive above him

Literally

Better make it two shirts.

Our pediatrician called this the “tiger on a branch” hold and asked me to try it with our one week old at his first appointment and I said “no thank you.”

Still traumatized by learning about the existence of Mr Baseball, a giant creature who emerges onto the outfield during the seventh inning stretch at the Diamonbacks’ AAA ballpark in Reno.

Kobe Bryant had a hall of fame career using one simple trick: he averaged 25 points per game.

With one lunch date, Paul Rudd could get us Universal Health Care.

Tough day for calf muscles