Quality Snark 🦀🔪🧿

It's war, people die. Sometimes they get bone spurs and have to ride in a golf cart.

[inventing the hot air balloon] I don't give a fuck where I go

Do rich people know they can be cool? Just spend the day on their yachts or whatever and leave the rest of us alone?

Store aisle shelves stuffed on one side with inflatable ducks faces the other, stuffed with inflatable flamingos.

some shit is about to go down

This question would be better directed to the current head of our health department.

Hail, Hydra!

My bad, I thought you were writing a parody of "Hot Blooded" by Foreigner. 😬

Psychotic Senator Breaks Veteran's Arm for Disagreeing

Sounds like 🐴💩 to me.

They’re stealing our jobs!

Gene Roddenberry: the Vulcan motto is "infinite diversity in infinite combinations"

Crypto-chuds: why is star trek woke now

Could God himself/herself make a burrito so big that even he/she themselves couldn't fold it?

I will miss Kristi Noem's inimitable constitutional insights, as when, asked by Sen. Maggie Hassan, D-N.H. at a Senate hearing to define "habeas corpus," she replied, "Habeas corpus is a constitutional right that the president has to be able to remove people from this country."

Kegsbreath served in the National Guard. He was deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan. He's a douchebag who has no business being anywhere near military leadership, but he has actually gone through basic training and served.

“Some people will die. Who knows, maybe even you.”

Donald J. Trump @realDonald Trump I am pleased to announce that the Highly Respected United States Senator from the Great State of Oklahoma, Markwayne Mullin, will become the United States Secretary of Homeland Security (DHS), effective March 31, 2026. The current Secretary, Kristi Noem, who has served us well, and has had numerous and spectacular results (especially on the Border!), will be moving to be Special Envoy for The Shield of the Americas, our new Security Initiative in the Western Hemisphere we are announcing on Saturday in Doral, Florida. I thank Kristi for her service at "Homeland."

“Kristi Noem will be moving to be Special Envoy for The Shield of the Americas, our new Security Initiative in the Western Hemisphere we are not announcing until Saturday because I just literally made it up and now my aides will have to figure out what the fuck it will actually do.”

Just heard Ben on Meidas Touch say that replacing Noem with MarkyMarkWayne is "like shitting your pants, then going home and changing your shirt."

Today the streets of DC are black with Kristi Noem's running mascara

Joe Rogan is what stupid people think smart people are like.

A Reductress post features a photo of Kristi Noem with the headline, “Kristi Noem Put Down for Being Too Hard to Train”

Screaming

Considering what happened to Cricket for being impossible to train, Donald let Kristie Noem off lightly.

“You can only watch” trolly meme depicting a man watching helplessly as a trolly mows over dozens of people tied to the tracks

checking the news again

On the plus side, Kristi Noem just got more free time to finally catch those Dalmatians

Are we sure he asked the right Markwayne to be DHS Secretary?

Beware of any Christian movement that demands the government be an instrument of God's wrath but never a source of God's charity, mercy, or compassion.

Please leave me to my delusion that they'll all get raptured off the planet soon and we'll finally have some peace.

This moment in time really drives home the FIFA Peace Prize’s stellar reputation for significance.

Justice for Cricket!!

Pistachio ice cream is the bomb ditty bomb.

Also, you just reminded me that there is a non-dairy pistachio creamer I've had my eye on.