A muscular cyclist sheathed in HercuFlex body armor pedals furiously on his titanium alloy bike, a long black ribbon of the metaverse stretching behind him. He eyes the timer on his bike’s HUD. Thirty seconds until the metaverse blinks out of existence entirely. He pedals harder but the virtual space around him seems to expand twofold for every thrust of his legs. So be it. If he is to die, let it be here, amidst the glorious ruins of what AI historians will one day call Zuck’s Folly.

BICYCLE.BMF

A long-haired heavy metal guitarist in the middle of a blindingly fast solo. His axe is emblazoned with lightning bolts that match his tattoo. Is that agony or ecstasy on his face? No one knows. And when he upshifts from 190 BPM to 220 BPM, no one cares. Meanwhile backstage, Grimbard looks on. Yes, he could use someone like this wraithlike manchild. When security shouts, Hey, you don’t belong here, Grimbard performs an arcane gesture with his left hand, and the guard walks away, oblivious to the way Grimbard hovers a few inches above the floor.

ROCKSTAI.BMF

NANCY BY ERNIE BUSHMILLER P1- NANCY RUNS INTO SLUGGO DOWNTOWN NANCY: OH, SLUGGO---WILL YOU COME WITH ME? SLUGGO:SURE P2- NANCY AND SLUGGO ARE ENTERING A PET SUPPLY STORE NANCY: I WANT TO BUY A SWEATER FOR MY DOG P3- NANCY IS TRYING TO DECIDE ON A SWEATER NANCY: HM-- LET'S SEE P4- NANCY: COULD YOU BARK A FEW TIMES TO HELP THE EFFECT? THE SALES CLERK IS LAUGHING BECAUSE SLUGGO WHO LOOKS VERY ANNOYED, AGREED TO TRY ON THE DOG SWEATER AND IS ON HIS HANDS AND KNEES

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller
November 16,1963

A Nintendo Entertainment System (NES), the hugely popular 8-bit video game console released in the United States in 1985. This image appears about 14 hours into “Clip/Art Film” (dir. Unknown, 2001, 1,445 minutes). The experimental documentary is a continuous sequence of hand-held camera shots, each focused on a single piece of clipart. The NES clipart appears on the screen for 16.7 seconds, during which a disembodied voice—likely the camera operator—can be heard whispering a series of unintelligible phrases. Fans on /r/clipartfilm/ have devoted countless hours to deciphering the words, with no success. The language is unidentifiable. It is neither modern nor ancient. Tricks like slowing down or speeding up or playing the phrases in reverse yield no results. Linguists who study artificial languages like Klingonese or Simlish have come up empty-handed as well. Glossolalia is the only answer, posts one Redditor with the username PentacostNow.

GAME01.BMF

An outline map of New York, a former state in the northeastern part of the former United States of America. In the 19th century, New York was home to the Leatherman, a vagabond who traveled the length of the former Hudson River wearing a leather suit roughly stitched by hand. The Leatherman slept in caves, spoke only in grunts, and avoided human settlements. Today, we are all Leathermen.

NY.BMF

two panels of a Nancy comic by Ernie Bushmiller. Nancy sees a NOTICE board and then blacks out the T with a pencil so the board reads NO ICE. Nancy smiles.

based nancy

I love Bao