[We see a close up of a young white male, tanned, white teeth, coiffed hair clearly an influencer on social media. It is an image such as you see when social media posts are shown on the news. In the corner of the screen is named a location: DUBAI. He is staring slightly off-camera for several silent panels of the comic strip. His eyes move slightly. He is having a thought.] From off-screen a newsreaderβs commentary comes: NEWSREADER: Extraordinary images here of an expat in Dubai [The influencerβs eybrows raise slightly] β¦Having their first ever geopolitical thought. [CUT TO a BBC news scene. The BBC newsreader CLIVE MYRIE is talking to an interviewee next to the screen showing the social media influencerβs face. The intervieweeβs name is David Jones]. CLIVE MYRIE: To explain the significance of this moment weβre joined by David Jones, our Expat Thoughts correspondent DAVID JONES: Clive, this is momentous It was caught on film at the end of an Instagram post titled: βDubai Is Brilliantβ. [Pointing at the screen, the influencerβs expression still the same] You can clearly see in the eyebrows here, the dawning realisation that there *might* be something in the world beyond his dickhead self. It marks a *huge* departure from all the Dubai Expatβs previous thoughts. CLIVE MYRIE: Which areβ¦? DAVID JONES: You've Got To Get Yourself Out Here Mate, Everything Is So Clean, I Don't Have To Pay Taxes, I Am Incurious As To Why I Do Not Have To Pay Taxes, and Spa. CLIVE MYRIE: And might we see an expansion of these new Thoughts in coming days? DAVID JONES: I think we can expect to see: βI Deserve To Be Airlifted By A Country I Pay No Tax Toβ CLIVE MYRIE: Mmm. [Ends]
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Hello darkness my old friend...
Gorton & Denton got me feeling like this
Matt "Good win"? More like Matt Cunt
anything for folks on District Heating?
Okay, this is quite outstanding from Bedford Council.
This is why the entire terrain of contest for decades has been *social* liberalism - who has rights, who deserves respect, and so on: because social liberalism doesnβt cost money, and doesnβt threaten the power structure. And if the right pushes back hard, it can simply be overturned and withdrawn.
The thing about Casablanca being the greatest film of all time is people don't believe you and then they watch it
how is Bergman Island not on this list?
also Slot's job is to make the most of the resources available and instead he's just refusing to even try to use at least 3 perfectly cromulent options (Endo, Chiesa, Rio)
I wouldn't mind the Pollyanna types normally but in addition to being bad we're also playing dreadful boring football and it ruins my week to have to sit through it over and over again
TRUMP: I invented electricity. did it one day, turned on a lamp and a scientist gasped and said wow how did you do that and I said I just flicked a switch and he started crying and saying "sir you've just saved Africa from ebola"
BBC NEWS: a sober reflection on healthcare from the President
TRUMP: my colon could wrestle a bear. a doctor told me. he said, have you ever considered getting surgery to have your colon removed and then entering it into a bear fight? because this is the best colon I've ever seen and I saw George Washington's
BBC NEWS: Mr Trump espouses American manufacturing
TRUMP: no-one has eaten more cheese than me. if anyone tells you otherwise they're a horse fucker. I eat cheese every day, sometimes two days. cheese is good, it's nutritious, it's for white people, you can't eat the plastic packaging but sometimes I do
BBC NEWS: and now we move onto foreign policy
TRUMP: honk honk honk, I'm a big goose. everyone tells me whenever I enter a room, that's the biggest goose I've ever seen and I say yes. I'm a big goose. in a good way. a lot of Somalians are small stupid gooses but I'm a big goose
BBC NEWS: a disciplined Trump sticks to the script on the economy
the only thing that really matters is we are playing miserable football that makes people sad to watch, regardless of results
Just fyi. On Friday, Lord Falconer, who's shepherding the assisted dying bill through the Lords, admitted that he thought it was fine if someone chose to die because they didn't have enough money for care
If you're left wing and support the principle, I really need you to look at the bill's details
Mark Felton will stalk you for the rest of your days
No I support the complete and total eradication of the Labour party as an electoral and organising force in the UK. That is my goal. That is my aim. For too long they have sat like a dead toad in UK politics, taking up room and festering. Enough. Out. Fuck off. Fuck you. This is my position.
where would Slot be on there? Somewhere near Rangnick?
Literally a publication for eight-year olds 40 years ago
this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to jump out of a helicopter to kidnap a head of state and his wife so some oil ceos can make a lot of money. weβll be watching from a resort in florida that still serves wedge salad and checking how many retweets we get. good luck soldier
the year is 2026
"He's not going to win a Nobel Peace Prize doing that"
Scene from "O Brother, Where Art Thou?"
Look, I'm sure that Nolan's adaptation of "The Odyssey" will be fun, but I highly doubt it will be as good as the original.
hopefully Elsevier grows up to be either a baker or a tailor