A screenshot from Letterboxd showing that tonight I did the absolutely insane double bill of Armageddon and Hamnet
Hard to think of two more divergent films to double bill, really
"Of course, we know the sobriquet Jar-Jar Binks is a corruption of the original name Charlie Kirk."
A newspaper headline from over a century ago, reading: WOMEN ANARCHISTS HAVE BECOME THE TERROR OF WORLDS POLICE Their Daring Crimes Are Said to Have Out- stripped the Deeds of Brothers of the Red Search for the Woman is Becoming a Safe Rule in Crimes Proceeding From Anarchistic ViolenceβThe Guardians of the World Nearly Always Finda Woman Implicated When a Ruler is Stricken DownβEmotional Women Lose Sense of Fear.
Happy International Women's Day. π΄
hobbit STUNS high elves by ordering lembas in perfect quenya
having to find this many MPs for Reform (and the Greens, to a lesser extent) is going to mean a lot more cranks in the Commons
criterion channel rn has a collection called YEARNING and a collection called STUNTS! and between them exits the entire spectrum of human art and emotion
The Unbearable Looksmaxx of Streaming
THE LOYAL SECOND KITCHEN DRAWER: The queen approacheth! Mayhap twill be this fine morrow when one of my tools will fulfil her desires!
THE DUSTY SPATULA, EVER-SCHEMING: Bah! The throne has made her foolish and complacent
The Charli xcx movie should have been set in the Avatar universe where Sully and the other Naavi had to fight a new species who are all the Brat green colour
There's a fun layout from 1930 where Screenland asked a bunch of movie stars to name the role they most wanted to play. Gary Cooper said Sydney Carton, Claudette Colbert said Juliet, etc.
William Powell said A Wealthy Retired Motion Picture Actor on the Riviera π #driveinmob
I would argue for Sam and Andrei Rublev (sidenote: god what a spectrum of vibes) also all the Bones eps obviously
big bill shakes is goated. sorry but i will never entertain the argument that heβs overrated. to write something like this and have it ring with such tremendous clarity four centuries later would be incredible if he pulled it off once but he did it dozens of times
Sure, youβre all making fun of the Melania movie, saying it has no cultural impact, but itβs an integral part of the Melania Cinematic Universe, and it sets up why the Trump Coins are important
'Temple Bar Memorial' (from 'This Is London', 1959) by Mirsoslav Ε aΕ‘ek
Sharron Davies ranting against 15 minute cities, because of course she is.
Suzanne Moore in the Telegraph saying she wants to... kill all dogs??
Julie Burchill asking "does it matter if Grok undresses us all?" in The Spectator
Graham Linehan in the midst of his now four-day-long double down on Alex Pretti's murder being justified and fine.
Calling transphobia a 'gateway drug' to the far right undersells it. It's pure accelerant. Grimly fascinating to guess what crankery becomes any famous transphobe's secondary obsession, cos they all have one: 15 minute cities are fascism! Grok noncing is cool! ICE are good! We should kill all dogs!
'Miss Gladys on the Veranda', St John's Wood (c.1933) by Harold Knight
(Private collection)
Iβm doing dry January (a month of straight faced, witty observational posts, delivered with minimal effort)
@inthesedeserts.bsky.social
Hey man I donβt know what youβre trying to achieve here but this is a joke reply to a picture of Sonic and Mario snogging
An illustration of Gawain holding the head of the Green Knight, with an axe held over Gawainβs neck.
β what else ought there be? β
Painting of a woman in old-fashioned dress riding a bicycle parallel to a locomotive with a lot of steam coming out of its chimney.
Artist: H. Gray (Henri Boulanger, 1858-1924)
imagining an all night diner in a redwall world. little rat smoking while cooking on a flaptop. burned coffee in an acorn mug. the whole thing is inside a pumpkin
The Southern Line
[12hrs into my ice interrogation]
agent: in 2021 you posted βthey should call him matt hardcock am i right fellasβ can you explain that?
me: do you know who matt hancock is?
a:β¦
[43mins later]
a: he had his own app? for parkour?
me: no the parkour was a separate issue
"I consider 35-year-olds the most interesting protagonists" is in the Bluesky Terms of Service
What if The Darkness were into Florence and The Machine instead of glam rock? Well Iβm sorry to say but that rules, actually
Totally! As someone who likes both comics and fine dining, I should have been a lock for it, but it just felt tacky in a way a themed party venue wouldnβt
Do you remember the Batman themed fine dining restaurant in London? It flopped because the audiences for those two things doesnβt have a lot of crossover
Comic, Page 1: P1: Outer space, showing several distant planets and a star, focusing on a foreground ringed planet that appears to have oceans and continents with large visibly man-made alterations, including bridges and a central trench of city circling the planet. Narration: "There are 11 billion sentient life forms on this planet. Uncountable artificial intelligences, consciousnesses stored in the core, more arriving every day" P2: A hand touches the top of an alien-looking casket. Narration: "One less, now." P3: The face of an alien person with an expression of grief, with pupil-less eyes, distinctive cheek markings, a metallic hoop around their neck, and a cloak, referred to from now as "MC". P4: Another person appears behind the first, with a floating holographic display of information in front of their face. Other person: "I take it you are aware of the duty the late Vhixyr is trusting to you?" MC: "Yes, I was told long ago."
Page 2: P1: MC is pictured silhouetted from behind, standing in front of a far-future city, full of other citizens and glass transport tubes in the sky stretching into the distance. Narration: "Out of over 11 billion, me." P2: (Blank) Narration: "Despite Vhixyr's insistence that I was just the best fit, I always wondered-" P3: MC's foot stepping on a panel. Narration: "I wondered if my dear grandparent harbored some secret resentment," P4: MC standing in front of a doorway, raising a hand to a glowing panel on the wall. Behind the doorway is swirling shapes and light. Narration: "...or if they just thought I was the only one who could forgive them for this life-long burden?" P5: MC walking on a transparent bridge through a void filled with swirling light. Narration: "But really, all that mattered-" P6: (Blank) Narration: "Is that there are five of them. ...of us."
Page 3: P1: Two arch-shaped desks with small cylindrical devices with 3 bulbs protruding from them, and a fan-shaped holographic display behind them showing a wave-form. MC: "I wasn't expecting your equipment to look so... ancient?" P2: A zoomed out view of the room, showing MC speaking to a larger smiling alien with an arch-shaped structure on their back, referred to from here as Council 1. Council 1: "For taking vibrations in the air. Ancient traditions, after all." P3: From behind MC, still speaking to Council 1, who is pointing at their own mouth. Council 1: "And I see you've been practicing your oral language!" MC: "No small effort - but we need to be able to speak this way for a full cycle after all." Council 1: "You get used to it." P4: Showing MC now. Council 1: "I trust you have now... viewed it, as well?" MC: "...of course." P5: Zooming out, showing both MC and Council 1, and another person in the back of the room by a large holo display. This person (Council 2) is slim, wearing a dark sleeveless shirt and a large brace over their shoulders. Council 2: "As of now, Earth has reached 89.3% of its sun-cycle." Council 1: "Then we will begin."
Page 4: P1: From left to right seated at the desk in front of holo displays, Council 2, Council 1, and a third Council member with a robe and a U-shaped brace framing their head, all with somber expressions. Council 1: "Today we welcome Thonriel, third grandchild of Vhixyr, to the order of T'ddub. Thonriel has the terrible and honorable charge of speaking first today, as our order convenes for audiograph number 0X7B65D. -ahem- So... what did you think?" P2: Thonriel (MC), wearing a grim expression and slamming their hand down on their own desk. "Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is still a bad movie."
The council convenes once more
#deathblart
Smash your foes in close combat Shrug off even the most grevious assaults Assemble your models without glue
βConan! What is best in life?β
