Guy Thoughts

Some of my best work is still pretty terrible.

Interesting seeing two follows who have a block between them make the same joke

You're good enough, you're smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like you

Why can't I delete replies in real life

I'm already house-trained and probably would accept crate training pretty easily

After I trim my beard, I like to gather up all the little cut hairs and throw them in the trash. Strongly recommend if you've never tried it.

My alt follows your alt

Hell yeah brother

Dip me like one of your French onions

First day of the rest of my cold

"What are you in for?" "Wrecked some dude's pervert glasses." *high fives all around*

Why would you do that?!

Women: We live in a constant state of vigilance because men pose a constant threat to us, here are literally millions of corroborating stories.

Men: What a scary time for men this is.

I hadn't thought about it in years but someone posted that image the other day and it all came flooding back

This phenomenon is central to a story idea I've been kicking around in my head for a few years

Yeah we do

Savage. But fair.

I know I sound crazy but instead of spending a billion dollars in a day to kill people in another country we should try spending a billion dollars in a day to help people in this country.

guys its really easy to not be weird on this app, you can be a normal guy towards women. it’s so easy, unless you already think you’re being normal, then your wiring is just fucked up and you should stay offline.

Cut me like one of your French beans

Where did the barn swallows nest before barns?

Oh it's THAT kind of plan

Sounds like a good omen

Heel turn

Women of a certain age (my own) are the hottest

Womanchester United is my squad

Yeah that was ever my default approach to classes. I was a sophomore in college before I found a way to organize my brain into regularly doing assignments with requisite care, and then only because my scholarships were threatened unless I improved my grades.

Haha right? I abbreviated the part of this story where he told me (paraphrased) that turning in half-assed assignments was disrespectful to him. So the talk did work; I only ever turned in assignments at all because I respected him a great deal, so I started putting in more effort.

I was a fast learner but a lousy student. I had another teacher call me out for the low quality of my homework; I would turn in flawless exams in a quarter of the allotted time, so he could tell I was spending no time at all on assignments.

That's just a nap sneakin' up on you