In the breakroom, Sonar, Prism and Malevola are sitting at a table. Prism yells "Roberto! Coop! Get in here!" Robert and Coupe at the door ask "What's Up?" Sonar says "We found your #1 fan, Bobby! Did you know there's Mecha Man fanfic?" Malevola says "Yeah! There's a whole-ass RPF fic about you as a normie!" Prism says "I think you can just say "RPF". It's like ATM" Malevola replies "ATM machine?" Prism says "Mal, you sayin' automatic teller machine machine" Malevola says "listen to this! Mecha Man's secret identity is... John Johnson!" Sonar interjects "That's Dick Dick, Bobby!" Robert rolls his eyes and says "ummm" while Coupe is looking shocked/stressed. Prism says "Yeah, well, 'Dick Dick' has this one bodyguard or whatever, and she's deadass in love with you!" Malevola says "Wait, why does Mecha Man have bodyguards?" and Prism replies "Dunno, I skipped those chapters."
Prism narrates "So John sends Monae away (that's the bodyguard's name) like, fires her ass." We see a anime-looking scene of John and Monae with cherry blossoms swirling in the wind as he says "Monae, I am deeply pained to say this... but I no longer require your services." Robert, annoyed, says "great, can I go now?" Sonar says "Wait! John gets jumped by a villain gang!" Prism says "and he's shot or whatever" Malevola says "But Monar returns as he's bleeding out." There is a text overlay from the fanfic: He was a mix of opposing forces, his arms, passably strong for a non-super human, now trembled, like the legs of a fawn swathed in birth viscera. But it wasn't the dark clutch of fear that held him (and she knew that look so well). No, the angel's face she beheld held no fear, she deigned to hope, deigned to desire, that his baby-god face was wrapped in reverence." Monae holds John in her arms as hey lays bleeding out, they are surrounded by fire and destruction as he says "Monae, I was a fool to send you away! That mistake has haunted me! The other bodyguards, they are weak - like useless babies! But you... Monae, you returned to me."
Monae holds John in her arms as he passes out from blood loss. The text overlay from the fanfic reads: “She felt his consciousness slip away, felt his body shudder and go lax, as if he had long struggled to climb the mountain of pleasure, laboring to climax, and finally reaching the dizzying peak, found the sweet kiss of release… But no, NO! His fragile body had clung to his consciousness for so long, and she hoped it had clung there: knowing that she would come for him, yearning to be entwined in her wired-steel arms.” Monae screams “John! Noooo! Don’t Leave me now!” Back in the break room, Sonar says “Wow, so Mecha Man dies?” While scrolling, Prisims says “No? He’s in a coma! She stays with him… he’s calling out her name.” Malevola says “He’s talking while in a coma?” Sonar says “Is that a thing?” Prism says “Fuck No!” Coupe has an unreadable, stressed face, and Robert is rolling his eyes. Malevola says “Oh look! He’s waking up!” We see John in a hospital bed, and Monae is standing over him. John says “Monae, is it really you? Of is this the handiwork of some shifty sorcerer set on seducing me with the sweetest of specters?” Back in the break room, Sonar asks “Are they going to fuck?” He looks annoyed and bored, and Prism and Mal are scrolling through the fic. Prism says “Oh! Here’s the spicy shit!” Coupe is sweating and side eyeing Robert, and he looks shocked and frightened.
In a romantic setting, Monae holds John in her arms, and they say each other’s names. The text overlay from the fic reads “The blood beneath his skin was gathering to the surface, his heart pounding each flow to his cheek, where he was flushed, pink, like a forbidden fruit, full of bloodied-sweet nectar. She hungered to bite, to taste the divine ambrosia of the gods, for it was the gods that sculpted his face. She leaned in, his body supple and yielding...” Monae and John kiss. Sonar cuts in and says “All that and they only kiss?” Prism says “Well, it is tagged ‘slow burn’” Mal says “Damn, so much build up for that?” Robert is pinching his nose in an irritated manner and says “Great, well, this has been riveting, but I need to-” Prism yells “Wait! There’s an epilogue!” Coupe looks terrified. She turns to the wall, and pulls the fire alarm. The fire alarm is ringing loudly and Coupe looks more composed, she points to the exit and says “We must evacuate the building immediately. Normies and children first (Robert that means you). Robert looks back at her, (hopefully) none the wiser.
Mecha Man / 'Original' Character: I'm re-posting the now complete comic! This is about a Coupé written fanfic! It miiiiight not be a great idea to write self-insert, real person fanfic about you and your boss... :) #dispatch #robertrobertson #dispatchcoupe
