Damnit Janet

Poops

We're all adults here at this casino, we can call it a shits table

a white couple and she’s holding a big fish. he kind of looks like he’s taking her from behind but they both have their jeans on so… this is an odd looking couple but i admire their clueless and carefree attitude towards life

it’s finally friday let’s get freaky

Haha, thanks - think my mind wandered a bit

😬

Yeah, if you swap em we're so screwed

It's like magnets

Maybe I’m just a banshee in a nurse’s uniform, you don’t know.

A sleepy tawny frogmouth sits atop a tree stump on a bright afternoon in the woodland aviary exhibition inside the Melbourne Museum.

Tawny frogmouth in full incognito as a pole muppet.

date idea: sitting side by side at the bus stop, gazing silently at the opposite side of the street, waiting for out ankles to touch or getting on the first random bus if they don't

They should invent water that isn't obsessed with my cuffs

What does it mean when your pee smells normal but it tastes like asparagus

Those hats look totally different

los and greg remaking the movie face/off, but wait…

wait…

The passage of space is when you knock over a drink, fall out of a chair, catch your pants as your suspenders snap off. Kinda sounds like time broke up with you

Might drive past the gym today.

"Address my content!" I shout as I sit in the playground sandbox and slowly shovel grit down my gullet

I say happy birthday a lot for someone that is diametrically opposed to all birth.

I like to think of myself as a delicate flower, but I’m sure there’s a reason my Daddy calls me his lil Snapdragon

[Looking back into the toilet] I should call him

i am mad as a waterlogged rooster I actually don’t know how mad that is but it sounds like a lot

We may disagree politically but we are all of us fascinated by parasitoid egg casings laid on the back of a tomato hornworm. Let’s build on this

benjamin the black and white stripy cat on an olive colored sofa looking v v suspicious

when your cat is not acting sus at all

I don't think we should be asking the war machine's opinion on war.

We don’t agree on much, but I think we can all agree with the way Johnny Cash sang ooooooo in Ring of Fire

our company’s monthly SEO report says our top keyword is up 69 positions and now my tongue hurts from biting it so hard

still so upset about that poor guy trying to cross a busy road. I’ll never forget my little Frogger

As my dogs manager I’m always tryna find new ways to help him evade the paparazzi

Babe. I promise you. The aliens have been inside of us all along.

Aww, wee lane is 😊